The Northampton Clown Catcher is the hero that Northampton deserves, and boy do they also need him right now.
Alright, I’ll stop being cute and attempt to take a story about grown men running around in costumes seriously now.
Last week (Friday the 13th) a man dressed as a clown (Pennywise from Stephen King’s It, if I’m not mistaken) started showing up around Northampton, England, standing outside of homes with a clutch of balloons and looking hella creepy.
He has his own Facebook page which has generated nearly 80,000 likes, and his admitted goal is really just general mischief. He basically wants to be the Unipiper or the Thong Cape Scooter Man of Northampton.
Police have not yet captured the Northampton clown, nor do they have any leads as to his identity. Don’t expect much out of the Northants Police, though. Chief Constable Adrian Lee admitted that he would “shake his [the Northampton Clown’s] hands for what he is doing” in a recent interview.
With such rampant corruption in the police department, who will stand for the people against the menace of the Northampton Clown? Meet Boris the Northampton Clown Catcher.
Though a handful of vigilantes have vowed to capture the Northampton Clown, Boris the Northampton Clown Catcher is the only individual (that we know of so far) who has actually donned a costume and made moves to compete with his nemesis on social media.
Boris has his own Facebook page, as well. “My name is Boris. I am the official clown catcher. I am not here to scare anyone. I am not here to hurt anyone. I come in peace!” he wrote.
First of all, “Boris the Northampton Clown Catcher” is the worst superhero name ever, but we’re willing to give him a break since every Joker needs a Batman. His costume needs a little bit of work, too. Right now, he kind of just looks like The Tick, if The Tick’s secret identity was compromised and he was revealed to be none other than the American rapper Pitbull.
But still, “he’ll do,” we say, because we actually really want to see these two throw down in an epic street match (which would likely result in both of them being thrown in jail). The problem is, there’s a huge possibility that will never happen because some people actually think these two are pals, or possibly even the same person.
This just got way too meta for me, so why don’t you just let me know what you think of Boris the Northampton Clown Catcher below.