The “smell of global power” is more than a metaphor now that you can buy Trump-, Putin-, and Trudeau-scented candles on Etsy for all of your holiday gift-buying needs. This is no joke, and the Trump candle even comes with a tuft of strawberry blonde hair. Made with quality ingredients, the price tag even puts the candle in Secret Santa price range.
Perhaps the next line will be first lady candles because even Democrats would likely enjoy a Melania Trump-scented candle. Melania Trump is always dressed to the nines, and although she was originally from a rural town in Slovenia, she now has an air of subtle sophistication, according to the Inquisitr. While Vladimir Putin doesn’t currently have a “plus one” (he was rumored recently to be dating Wendi Deng Murdoch, the ex-wife of Rupert Murdoch), Justin Trudeau is married to Sophie Gregoire, a former television host from Quebec, who looks like she could smell like roses and fresh pine.
Give the gift of a Donald Trump candle this Christmas https://t.co/WPnhw9Srck— Digital Spy Tech (@digitalspytech) December 5, 2016
CNET says that access to Trump, Putin, and Trudeau is closer than you would think, because there is an Etsy store that sells candles scented like each of the world leaders. The Donald Trump candle is even said to come with a “toupee topper” that mimics the president-elect’s hairstyle. Even the promotional wording rings true to Trump style.
“We’ve made a great, great candle. It combines all of the classiest smells (suntan lotion and steak) to produce an aroma that is tremendous.”
And the copy also has a tongue-in-cheek reference to the “small hands” barb that was circulating during the campaign.
“The Trump-Scented Candle may look small in the photo, but we guarantee you there’s no problem.”
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The Putin candle also comes with witty tag lines, if you have a taste for a little Russian, which is said to have “less hair and more shirtlessness.” As you would imagine, the Putin candle smells of the great outdoors and maybe a hint of testosterone.
“The Putin-Scented Candle combines notes of pine, earth and smoke billowing from the cities of your enemies. It is a manly fragrance, designed to evoke the essence of Vladimir Putin and eliminate the smell of political dissidents from your home.”
Need a stocking stuffer idea? Now your home can smell like our PM! Oh, there's a Donald Trump scented candle too!... https://t.co/OxKfxSRg2h— Soft Rock 97.7 (@softrock977) December 5, 2016
Your last option is an attractive red candle, that is the scent of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau that “blends the rich scent of chai tea (because he drinks tea) with maple (because Canada).” The candle is said to scream “hot Canadian guy,” or to American audiences that are more familiar with New England, “hot Vermont guy.”
But there is a bonus to the Justin Trudeau candle, as it can be purchased without a wick, but even wickless, the candle is “pretty strong.”
“If candles are prohibited in your dorm/office/firehouse/etc., upon request we will make you a candle without a wick. We are not kidding and we have done this before. The candle still smells pretty strong.”
The Toronto Sun reports that the candles are $18.50 for Americans and $25.56 for Canadian customers. They are made by a husband-and-wife team who were looking to combine their candle-making with their sarcasm. The Etsy page says that the Trump candle, of course, comes in a beautiful shade of orange.
“The candle comes in a beautiful shade of orange that looks very natural and not at all weird and off-putting.”
And the Justin Trudeau candle comes with blown-up photos of Trudeau on the lid, “just in case you wanted to kiss a miniaturized version of the Canadian Prime Minister.”
There is no indication on the Etsy page if you can get a price break for ordering all three in order to have a mini-summit, but there is a place to ask questions or leave comments.
Would you prefer a Trump, Putin, or Trudeau candle?
[Featured Image by Maya Kruchankova/Shutterstock]