Here’s the latest candidate for the world’s dumbest criminal — an Ohio man called police to report that his wife had stolen his stash of cocaine, a misguided tattle-tale that backfired spectacularly and landed him in handcuffs.
The call came in late on Wednesday from an apartment in Westwood Avenue in Canton. Police said the man had a theft to report, but not what you might expect.
“(He) called 911 because he claimed that his wife stole his cocaine,” the jail records said.
It got worse from there. As the Canton Repository noted, when police arrived, they found that the 39-year-old man already had an outstanding warrant for his arrest. They also found a glass pipe, which the man freely admitted he used to smoke marijuana.
The man — who was not named by the newspaper — might have some competition for the title of world’s dumbest criminal. In New York, a 36-year-old named Jason Brown was arrested for erratic driving. That in itself isn’t too noteworthy, but his arrest record certainly was — Brown had already been arrested 41 times before.
You would think that someone with 41 arrests on his record might be a little careful when out driving, but not Jason Brown. Instead, police found that he was holding marijuana and also concealing “heroin and cocaine within his body.”
Brown ended up being charged with “aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle (first degree), criminal impersonation, unlawful possession of marijuana and criminal possession of a controlled substance (seventh degree, two counts),” according to the Suffolk County news release.
The Ohio man isn’t the only one to rat himself out on drug charges. Back in 2013, a man in Wilmington, North Carolina, called police to report that his drug dealer didn’t bring the marijuana and cocaine that he’d paid for.
The 911 caller, identified as “Dave,” said he paid the dealer $80 for the drugs, but the dealer never returned with the goods.
“I’m waiting on this guy to do the right thing,” Dave told the 911 dispatcher.
Dave did have one advantage over the Ohio criminal — he never showed his face to police, and avoided arrest despite the dumb call.
Police arrested Ohio’s candidate for the world’s dumbest criminal on charges of misusing 911 and possession of drug paraphernalia, both misdemeanors. They never said if the “stolen” cocaine was found.
[Image via CBC]