GOP State Rep Tom Kirby Introduces Bill To Ban Glow-In-The-Dark Human Beings

Tom Kirby glow in the dark

Tom Kirby, a Republican state representative from Loganville, Georgia, wants his state to “take the lead” in making sure than human beings are never made to glow in the dark, by mixing human DNA with that of a jellyfish. To address the issue, Kirby has introduced a bill in the Georgia state legislature that would ban the possibility of glow-in-the-dark, human/jellyfish hybrids.

If the bill passes, it would be bad news for glowing superheroes such as Dr. Manhattan, pictured above (right), from the film and comic book Watchmen.

The bill introduced by the 54-year-old Republican legislator is titled The Ethical Treatment of Human Embryos Act. His official website explains the bill’s intention.

“We in Georgia are taking the lead on this issue,” Kirby writes on the site. “Human life at all stages is precious including as an embryo. We need to get out in front of the science and technology, before it becomes something no one wants. The mixing of Human Embryos with Jellyfish cells to create a glow in the dark human, we say not in Georgia. This bill is about protecting Human life while maintaining good, valid research that does not destroy life.”

A Georgia television news reporter, Lori Geary, of Atlanta station WSB-TV, is so far the only media member to question Kirby about the seemingly bizarre bill, in an interview that saw the legislator admit that the potential threat of human-animal hybrid creatures — as envisioned by science fiction author H.G. Wells in his classic novel The Island Of Dr. Moreau — is “not a subject people sit around the dinner table talking about.”

“The people who support life are all behind it, but it’s not being brought on anybody’s behalf,” Kirby told Geary, who wondered what motivated him to author the legislation. “This is my bill.”

When Geary asked Kirby why anyone would want to genetically combine human beings with jellyfish, he answered, “To make them glow in the dark is the only thing I know of.”

But Kirby’s bill reportedly has the backing of five other Georgia lawmakers.

One of those backers, however, will not be Kirby’s Democratic colleague Vincent Fort, who reacted with surprise when hearing about the anti-glowing people bill.

“It invokes a chuckle, but at the same time, it’s a waste of precious time, when we could be dealing with issues like transportation, education, and jobs,” Fort said.

Tom Kirby told Geary, however, that if Georgia fails to pass the legislation banning human-animal hybrids, “we’re going to be chasing our tails.”

[Images:Tom Kirby/Warner Bros]