There’s crazy, and then there’s “let’s mass impregnate all of Russia’s women with Putin’s sperm via mail” crazy.
But that’s what Russian lawmaker Yelena Borisovna Mizoulina, who is the Chairwoman of Parliamentary Commission on Women’s Affairs, Children, and Family, supposedly suggested during a political round table debate, according to the Russian newspaper Trust.
Although the newspaper is in Russian, Fox News provided a translation of what Mizoulina said.
“The essence of my proposition is simple. Each female citizen of Russia will be able to receive by mail the genetic material of the President, get pregnant from him and have a baby. These mothers will be receiving special allowances from the government.”
We’ve all heard of Russian mail order brides, so maybe Russian mail order babies isn’t that far of a leap.
As for what would happen after these incredibly patriotic women used Putin’s sperm?
Mizoulina apparently had an answer for that, as well, saying, “And after the birth of the child, he will have to be given to be raised into the special institutions that resemble Suvorov Schools with the aim that he will be loyal to the Motherland and personally to the President of RF.”
A Suvorov school is similar to an American military boarding school, and “RF” refers to the Russian Federation.
And it goes without saying that Putin’s sperm would produce only male children.
Mizoulina is also quoted as saying, “Children born from the Russian president in the future will form the military and political elite of the state.”
Putin’s sperm would reinvigorate a sense of patriotism in the country, Mizoulina believes, and it also addresses a very real problem that Russia is facing — that of fertility. Due to a combination of low fertility rates along with high mortality rates, Russia’s birth rate has declined about 4 percent since the breakup of the USSR, which is statistically significant. In 2006, Putin called Russia’s low birth rate as the country’s “most urgent problem,” and in 2007, the Russian government gave women who had more than one child $11,000 in cash. In 2011, Putin announced an additional $53 billion to be spent in order to encourage women to give birth.
All very generous programs, but Putin never mentioned doing the impregnating himself, or donating his own sperm by mail.
One Russian national tells the New York Observer that the story is false, that it is nothing more than “total BS from the yellow Ukrainian Press.” And he may very well be right — the idea of mass impregnating women with Putin’s sperm certainly seems far-fetched.
But Mizoulina, whose position is similar to that of a U.S. House Representative, has had some pretty crazy ideas in the past. She recommended at one point that all Russian Jews should leave the country, saying, “We have enough problems.” She also introduced a bill last spring that banned young women who have not yet given birth from higher education. And then she drafted a law attempting to prohibit “sexual intercourse in the territory of the Republic of Crimea and Sevastopol.”
Mailing Russian women Putin’s sperm still seems wild… although if, in 20 years, an army of bald, bare-chested men riding on horseback suddenly appears, the Russian newspaper Truth’s story will be validated.
To see what else Putin has been up to, besides having his sperm gifted by his parliament, read about how he feels Russia is blameless in the pact it signed with Nazi Germany.
[Image via funnyjunk.com]