Darth Vader's Wife

Darth Vader’s Wife Reportedly Punched In The Face

Darth Vader’s wife was reportedly punched in the face by an Englishman during a heated domestic dispute, according to The Huffington Post. Before you start pouring over your Blu-ray box set in a desperate search for this missing piece the Star Wars puzzle, it’s worth noting that this particular incident took place on the other side of the silver screen.

Here’s what happened: Darth Vader, a man who was once known as Mark Nokes before he officially changed his name years ago, was accused of sleeping with 35-year-old Ikbal Hare’s girlfriend. Not surprisingly, it didn’t take long for the exchange to turn violent. At one point during the scuffle, Hare allegedly threw a wild punch that missed its intended target. As a result, Lord Vader’s wife took a blow to the cheek.

The Express & Star reports that Mrs. Vader attempted to step between her husband Darth and his accuser during the scuffle. The end result was a bruised cheek and an amusing news story.

After the alleged assault, Hare fled the scene of the crime with several individuals hot on his heels. However, police wouldn’t locate and arrest the suspect until two days later at his girlfriend’s home. Apparently punching Darth Vader’s better half isn’t worthy of an all-points bulletin.

For his crimes against the Sith Lord, Hare — who pleaded guilty to possessing a bladed article, assaulting Vader’s wife, and disorderly behavior — is presently staring down 18 months worth of probation. In order to make sure the guy keeps his temper in check during future confrontations, Hare will also be made to attend an anger management course. The cherry on this legal dessert is the 200 hours of community service the assailant has waiting for him down the road.

Darth Vader’s wife will reportedly survive the ordeal without any permanent damage. Lord Vader, meanwhile, should probably brush up on his force powers.