Magazine: Final Fantasy XIII “the biggest swindle in gaming history”
From the archive: published Jan 11, 2010, 16 years ago. Details may have changed since.
Final Fantasy XIII will release in North America and Europe in two months, but don’t expect quotations from this straight-outta-leftfield review from a Hong Kong-based magazine to make an appearance on the box. Awarding the game a 4 out of 10, the review in question has had fanboys on the ‘net gnashing and wailing, a sound I shall never grow tired of hearing.
Anyhow, here’s the mag’s breakdown of a game that Japanese gaming publication Famitsu awarded a 39/40:
Scenario: 2.0 — “An epic tear jerker” System: 1.0 — “Such a crude system barely warrants being called an RPG at all.” Graphics: 9.0 — “Full marks here.” Sound: 7.0 — “Mostly quality.” Enthusiasm: 1.0 — “As if you could play this for 100 hours! I could put up with 8.” Total: 4.0 — “To think it got this bad…”
The write-up concludes by calling Final Fantasy XIII the “biggest swindle in gaming history” and “the biggest joke of 2009.” There is a disclaimer to this, however: the magazine admits that the review is written by a “complete non-gamer,” which … explains things somewhat.