The selfie of Serena Williams meeting tennis fan-girl Kate Middleton at Wimbledon may have been quite fantastic, but after the hysterical laughter had died down and the magical moment had gone, one was left with an uneasy feeling that Kate’s choice of outfit had let her down somewhat.
Although the cut of the Duchess’s dress was, as usual, simply divine, the shade of the outfit, which can only be described as egg yolk yellow, was absolutely garish.
As one of the most disliked and unflattering of colors, yellow is a tricky hue to wear well. In fact, a yellow outfit often wears the wearer and leaves them looking like a rather plump and uncomfortable canary who’s just had their wings clipped.
The color yellow has long been associated with mustard. Which is all well and good, but one would do well to remember that mustard works best as a compliment and a side serving to bring out the succulent flavors in a well-cooked piece of beef. It’s not a main dish in its own right. Sadly, somebody forgot to tell Kate Middleton.
The shocking visage of the Duchess in yellow at such a high-profile event as Wimbledon was an apocalyptic faux pas. More disturbing still, this is not the first time that the Duchess has opted for this vilest of hues and most grotesque of shades.
In fact, Kate’s granny-in-law, Queen Elizabeth is also a fan of the slightly nauseating color.
The Queen was recently in Edinburgh, wearing a ghastly ensemble which made her look like a frightful lemon on legs.
Admittedly, the Queen is sovereign, and one should allow Her Majesty certain indulgences, but her love of yellow outfits is a bit beyond the pale, even for one so elevated.
Obviously, the Queen’s choice of wardrobe has been highly influential on the easily led Duchess of Cambridge, who is extremely susceptible to other people’s opinions and eager to please.
There was a period when Kate wouldn’t be seen in public at high-profile events without her trademark nude shoes.
Nude shoes have long been the footwear of choice for a well-heeled horse lover wishing to compliment their pastel dresses and oversized hats with some nude sledge shoes. The Queen swears by them, but on a younger filly such as Kate, nude shoes suggest a distinct lack of awareness on what’s hot to trot and what’s not.
In a 2012 article in Grazia magazine, a columnist suggested, “It occurs to me that not since the eighties, when working-class girls were mocked and satirized for their love of white stilettos in all seasons, has one shoe so defined a class in society. In 2012, quite simply, the nude heel is the white stilly of the middle classes. Only infinitely less fun, and so much less cool than the 80s classic.”
Wearing granny’s shoes is one thing, but a line must be drawn in the sand when it comes to wearing dresses which make one look like an over-ripe banana.
Yellow may be considered the color of happiness, optimism, enlightenment, creativity, sunshine and spring, but scratch the surface and this most beastly of colors represents cowardice, betrayal, egoism, and madness.
In Russia, “yellow house” used to be a colloquial expression for an insane asylum.
Yellow is also the color of caution and physical illnesses such as jaundice, malaria, and pestilence.
Now why would any right thinking fashionista wish to drape themselves in a shade of cloth which boasts such associations?
For pity’s sake, there’s also a medical term to describe the intense fear of yellow –Xanthophobia.
Even Prince William’s savage criticism of Kate’s yellow dress, which she was previously seen sporting during her 2014 trip to Australia, was not enough to deter the Duchess from revisiting the nightmare at Wimbledon.
If one recalls, Wills said the aforementioned dress made his wife look like a banana. How cruel, but obviously not cruel enough to prevent Kate from making the exact same mistake again.
Let’s hope, Kate comes to her senses and ditches the egg yolk dress for something a little more sophisticated and refined for her next public engagement.
As Holden Caulfield once said, “It’s no fun to be yellow. What you should be is not yellow at all.”
(Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images)