Redneck Lives Matter: An Oregon Militia Update


As the armed standoff in Oregon continues, the militia members who claim to be saving the Republic and the constitution have largely turned into comedy material for the rest of the country.

After storming a bird sanctuary in the wilderness and forgetting to bring food, the militia members began receiving dildos and lube from their fans and went on to become the subject of late night comedy.

Bill Maher joined the growing list of comics poking fun at the Oregon militia Friday night with his “redneck lives matter” speech, reports Salon.

“How tough can you rugged individualists be when the first thing you did after storming the rest stop was to post an appeal online for supplies? A shopping list, really, that included such items as throw rugs, shampoo, foot warmers, and French vanilla coffee creamer. What, no scrunchies so you can braid each other’s hair?”

Comparing the “wakadoodle militia” members to liberal college kids at Yale, Maher said it was only possible to be a hero when there was “something to be heroic about,” according to Breitbart.

“Do we have to go to DEFCON 1 for everything in this country? Where’s the perspective anymore?”

Oregon Gov. Kate Brown got into the act this week with a letter to President Obama and another to Attorney General Loretta Lynch and FBI Director James Comey, according to Gawker.

Calling the militia members “armed criminals,” Brown demanded an end to the armed standoff and insisted on a “swift resolution” for the benefit of area residents who were essentially being held captive to the group’s wild agenda.

The militia members and their leader, Ammon Bundy, claim to be fighting for individual rights and an end to federal land use policies in the West, but they’ve already lost the support of local Native American tribes.

After a video surfaced on Facebook last week appearing to show armed militants rifling through an artifact storage area, Burns Paiute tribal chairperson Charlotte told Gawker the tribe wanted the militia members prosecuted.

“I don’t know what these people are doing if they are doing things to just get a rise or to be martyr, all they are doing is making enemies out of the people they professed to support.”

After posting a Facebook video demanding an end to the hate mail and dildo delivery, the militia group responded to its critics by forming a common law court to indict government officials, reports Think Progress.

Despite having no actual legal standing, the militants have appointed a judge and are attempting to create an alternative legal system to replace Oregon law with their own.

Perhaps such contempt for the American legal system shouldn’t come as a surprise, as at least one member of the militia group is a convicted criminal. Los Osos resident Neil Sigurd Wampler, 68, was convicted of killing his father in 1977 and is prohibited from owning a gun, according to the San Luis Obispo Tribune.

Two other militia members, from Arizona, have recently had their foster children seized by child welfare officials. The Department of Child Safety declined to comment on the matter, but militia leaders Robert “LaVoy” Finicum and Blaine Cooper contend the children were taken to pressure the militants into surrendering their position, according to the USA Today.

“CPS is threatening to take my kids from me because of the stand we are making here.”

Having already been disavowed by the ranchers they claim to be fighting for, the Hammonds, and local residents, the out of state militia members have vowed to stay until they decide to leave.

[Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images]

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