Family Radio rapture-huckster Harold Camping has taken the massive apocalypse-prediction fail he sustained this weekend in stride, claiming that Judgment Day came and went without notice and the end of the world shall arrive on October 21st, for real, you guys.
Camping spoke for 90 minutes in a “rambling” speech broadcast to followers on the internet and via Family Radio. In his speech, the fire-and-brimstone preacher indicated that the third time’s the charm when predicting the fiery, torture laden deaths of most of humanity while the righteous are sucked bodily into heaven. Camping said of his inaccurate positions:
“I was truly wondering what is going on. In my mind, I went back through all of the promises God has made, all of the proofs, all of the signs and everything was fitting perfectly, so what in the world happened? I really was praying and praying and praying, oh Lord, what happened?”
And no matter how hard he prayed, God did not will hellfire and destruction to begin obliterating humanity at Camping’s insistence. Still, Camping says, the end really is nigh and please stop asking him about it:
“The world has been warned,” said Mr. Camping, who said this would be his last interview. He added that his company — which had bought billboard space nationwide to promote the May 21 date — would not promote his new prediction, Oct. 21.
“We don’t have to talk about this anymore,” he said.
As for donations made by those who bought Camping’s tale, he said there would be no refunds:
“We’re not at the end,” he said, “Why would we return it?”
Grudgingly, Camping offered a half-ass apology to the people who sold their houses, spent their retirement funds on billboards and quit their jobs:
“If people want me to apologize, I can apologize” — before adding that the missed prediction had somewhat humbled him. “I’m not a genius,” he said. “I pray all the time for wisdom.”