Earlier this week, Mel B released her new memoir, Brutally Honest, and now the former Spice Girl is garnering lots of attention for the brutally honest confessions she’s detailed. From her career to her personal life, Mel B has opened up about topics she’s never discussed publicly. Like many celebrities, Mel B has also had a glimpse of the dark side of fame battling substance abuse and depression. Although the beautiful singer has basked in the limelight for many years, she’s admitted that life wasn’t always as glamourous behind closed doors. In fact, there were times she’d brave a good face for the cameras just moments after abusing cocaine.
According to Black America Web, Mel B – whose real name is Melanie Brown – recently revealed she’d done cocaine everyday while she was on X-Factor. It has been reported that Mel B was at such a low point in her life, she turned to cocaine to cope. With the marital problems she faced at home and the challenges Mel B faced to keep her career afloat, she “started using cocaine to get me through the run of show, to get me through living with (ex-husband Stephen Belafonte), which felt like neurotic claustrophobia… On so many levels, I felt myself sinking.”
Mel B explained how she viewed her cocaine usage as a “quick fix” to help her get through each day. In her memoir, Mel B reportedly wrote, “a line of that white powder when I got up in the morning,” as it helped “blur the voices around you, it can keep you in your own world, or it can keep you moving.”
“I didn’t want all the crap in my life to get in the way of the job I wanted to do, and knew, I was doing really well,” she wrote, noting that her “quick fix answer was cocaine. It took me less than a minute to get my hands on a regular supply – such is the power of celebrity,” she stated in her book.
“I started using a couple of lines before I went into work.”
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5 days to go peeps!!!There is so much in my book that still is sooo soooo painful for me to remember. I’m also very dyslexic and I knew I couldn’t narrate my book on my own so I wanted to find an amazing mixed race actress from Leeds to be my “voice” in my memoir #BrutallyHonest. And guess what,I found her @zarclover I love her so much because she took my pain and all my emotion and made it so very, very real. I cried when I listened to her reading it for the first time,and I still cry when I listen to it today,But I also do laugh too because in the darkness there is always light and humour. You will find out.. Listen to a clip of Zaraah’s amazing, heartful performance here, and pre-order the audiobook on @audible_uk and @Audible today.
After a while, cocaine usage became part of Mel B’s daily routine. She went on to candidly discuss the internal war she faced when her conscience would step in. “I’d wake up in the morning and snort two lines. Then I would pray: ‘God, I’m sorry for taking cocaine, but please, God, help me get through this day.’ I was ashamed of what I was doing, but I felt I had to have it.”
Mel B admitted that she was likely snorting about “five or six lines a day before and after work.” Although it initially seemed to help, there were side effects that ultimately impacted other areas of her life. “The cocaine only made my depression worse, and I was permanently anxious and on edge.”
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Yippee!!! I’m sooooo excited and sooooo emotional and sooooo sooooo happy that my book is finally here wow!!! This has taken 2 years of blood sweat and ALOT of tears to write AND 10 years of pain I am still trying to process.I am sooooo grateful and sooooo humbled by the support I’ve had from @womens_aid and @louise.gannon97 who helped me write it and piece my life together, From Women and men from family friends my spice girls of course and my amazing amazing fans. My book is Number 10 in the best seller list number 1 celebrity biography wow wow wow! but my very first review from a lady still in an abusive relationship has touched me more than I can say. I was you, I am you and I will keep fighting fir you .. #youarenotalone #iamyou #unbreakable #stopabuse
In the memoir, Mel B also offered detailed accounts of other personal battles she’s faced. She admitted her bout with depression also led to a suicide attempt that she ultimately overcame but now she’s in a much better place in her life. Brutally Honest is now available for purchase.