August Ames: Suicide Note Found In Adult Film Actress’ Car, History Of Sexual Abuse And Depression Unearthed

Ethan MillerGetty Images

August Ames’ suicide note was found in her car days after she was found dead in Camarillo, California, as a new report unveiled her history of sexual abuse and possible mental health problems prior to her death.

According to a new update from The Blast, the Ventura County Medical Examiner discovered a letter allegedly written by the 23-year-old deceased adult film actress prior to her death on Tuesday, December 5.

Based on the report, Ames apologized to her family for taking her own life, but made no reference to bullying and whether or not she killed herself after being accused of homophobia for refusing to work with a man who performed in “gay porn” in the past.

Many of August Ames’ friends and family have been under the impression that she committed suicide because of a recent Twitter storm where she was criticized for her post about choosing whom she wanted to work with.

In fact, his brother, James Grabowski, blamed bullies for pushing her to end her own life, based on a previous report from the Inquisitr.

“Bullying is not a joke. It took my sister’s life and I can’t get her back,” he wrote in a Facebook post that has since been deleted.

“I lost my baby sister yesterday. There is no replacing a love and bond like I had with her. She was my rock and I was hers.”

Based on the report from The Blast, August Ames was found dead at a public park at around 3:45 a.m. local time. The medical examiner has since declared her cause of death to be asphyxiation due to hanging and initial investigation on the scene revealed no trace of foul play.

With people thinking that she commited suicide because of the vicious posts about her for being a homophobe, the Independent UK took a glimpse at Ames’ past and found that she suffered from sexual abuse and may have incurred a mental health problem because of that.

null

According to the report, August Ames, whose real name is Mercedes Grabowski, admitted on the Holly Randall Unfiltered podcast in September that she experienced “a lot of sexual molestation” while growing up. At the time, she confessed that the trauma she felt had been compounded because people did not believe her when she tried to get help, causing her to still feel depressed at the time of the interview.

“It was just awful. It’s still recent where I have to keep myself occupied or else I start thinking about all that s*** and then I fall into a depression.”

The 23-year-old adult film actress had also revealed how she hated therapy because of most doctors’ reactions when they learn about what she does for a living.

“I would get in contact with some people and then I would feel badly because they’d be like ‘what’s your profession and I’d be like ‘oh, I’m in the adult industry’ and then I’d feel like they’re like ‘oh, that’s the whole reason that you are the way you are’ and then I’d get turned off.”

August Ames had also admitted that she had a history with drugs while growing up. Toxicology tests are still being performed to her remains, although initial reports stated that there was no drugs or alcohol found at the scene or in her vehicle.