UPDATE: Kelly has since confirmed that despite her confession in the interview she “never contemplated suicide because of my weight.” She added on Twitter, “I said people had no idea I was unhappy oddly enough because I appeared healthy.”
Kelly Clarkson is making a shocking and heartbreaking confession about her past struggles with weight and body image issues and revealing how her desperate attempts to get “skinny” during the early days of her career made her want to “kill herself.”
Per People, Kelly, who shot to fame after winning the first season of American Idol in 2002, opened up about her past struggles in a very candid new interview where she confessed that when she was so miserable at her lowest weight she was ready to quit.
“When I was really skinny, I wanted to kill myself. I was miserable, like inside and out, for four years of my life,” Clarkson told Attitude magazine in a new interview, admitting that she felt a whole lot of pressure from music executives to lose weight and to look a certain way for the sake of her career.
“No one cared,” she claimed of how she was left to battle her demons alone, “because aesthetically you make sense.”
Calling that particular time in her life “very dark,” Kelly admitted that she was in such a bad place that she thought the only way out was to quit.
“I thought the only way out was quitting,” she said of her weight battle amid the release of her hugely popular and multi-platinum 2004 album, Breakaway. “I, like, wrecked my knees and my feet, because all I would do is put in headphones and run. I was at the gym all the time.”
Fortunately, Kelly – who is now married to husband Brandon Blackstock and has two children – now seems to have overcome her struggles with weight and body image issues and has a much healthier outlook on her body.
Clarkson explained to the outlet that a lot of the self-acceptance she feels now came from changing the people in her life, particularly when it came to her career.
“You are who you surround yourself with,” Kelly recently told the British magazine of the big change she made in her life to change her outlook on her body. “I was around some really negative people, and I got out of it because I had a lot of great people there too. It was a case of turning around, facing them and walking toward the light.”
Kelly has been very vocal about her struggles with her weight in the past, even revealing that she battled bulimia in high school. However, Clarkson told Redbook magazine in 2015 that she’s now in a much happier place and no longer “obsesses” over her weight and also isn’t too bothered about what other people have to say about her.
“I don’t obsess about my weight,” she said per E! News of her now healthy outlook on health and fitness, “which is probably one of the reasons why other people have such a problem with it.”
“There are just some people who are born skinny and with a great metabolism – that is not me,” Clarkson continued to the magazine two years ago, admitting that she wishes she had a better metabolism but doesn’t obsess or get upset over gaining a pound. “You always want what someone else has.”
As for what’s next for the pop superstar, who will be releasing her latest album The Meaning of Life on October 27, Kelly will be making her debut on Season 14 of NBC’s The Voice next year alongside Blake Shelton, Adam Levine, and Alicia Keys.
And while she may be one of the nicest women in music, Kelly recently teased that that doesn’t mean she’ll be going easy on her fellow coaches of the contestants.
Season 14 of The Voice is expected to debut in February 2018.
[Featured Image by Ethan Miller/Getty Images for dcp]