Florida Man Blames Masturbation For Bizarre Rampage
A Florida man has been arrested after going on a bizarre and destructive rampage. However, it’s not the crime he allegedly committed that’s attracting attention. Instead, the motive given to authorities has social media abuzz. The Orlando Sentinel reports that 25-year-old William Timothy Anderson Thomas was arrested after he was found outside a home without a shirt on, and covered with dirt and mud.
Authorities say that the residence had damage to it, with a trailer outside having a flat tire. A window was also broken and a mailbox was smashed. A realty sign was also destroyed. When police interviewed the Florida man about the vandalism at the Largo home, he replied that he wanted to go out and destroy stuff because he had been masturbating and listening to loud music.
Eagles Safety Nate Allen — Suing Police Over Mistaken Masturbation Arrest http://t.co/2GqqlfvwUe
— TMZ (@TMZ) March 20, 2015
This isn’t the first time masturbation has been blamed over various actions and behaviors. It’s also far from the only time a masturbation-related incident has made media headlines. In 2013, a Swedish man was caught masturbating in public, and was originally given charges associated with sexual assault. However, he was ultimately cleared of the charges. In 2014, rapper 50 Cent pitched for the opening of a New York Mets game. The pitch was horrible, attracting a ton of criticism on social media and in mainstream news. Like the Florida man in this latest incident, 50 Cent blamed excessive masturbation for his horrible pitching skills.
Christian pastor warns female masturbation is “path to Satan.” Fear many of my followers are in thrall of Lucifer.https://t.co/zddtcT3dr1
— Brianna Wu (@Spacekatgal) April 12, 2016
SOCIAL media campaigns can be a dangerous game, but KFC’s latest post may be the most disturbing one yet…. https://t.co/7aUWBYoxFh
— 2B Advertising (@2B_Design) April 15, 2016
Former San Diego mayoral candidate Carl DeMaio is also no stranger to controversy surrounding masturbation. He was once accused of masturbating in a bathroom, during which time another political figure walked in and caught him. He famously denied these rumors and called them “gross” attempts at assassinating his character.
Freaky Sex Fact: Kellogg’s Corn Flakes were invented by a Dr. Kellogg in hopes that they would reduce masturbation https://t.co/YvMHRFDC5d
— Angelina Papa (@AngelinaPapa3) April 6, 2016
— Dharam K. Samra (@dksamra) September 5, 2013
Given that multiple witnesses accuse him of public masturbation, Congress candidate Carl #Demaio must think he can win single-handed.
— Plashing Vole (@PlashingVole) October 26, 2014
— CBS 4 News (@kgbt) May 7, 2015
This also isn’t the only bizarre story out of Florida. In fact there are entire accounts and pages on social media dedicated to stories about the collective “Florida man.” There are stories about “Florida woman” as well. To people on social media, Florida is the gift that keeps on giving when it comes to bizarre and frightening news stories.
— Tales Of Dumbasses (@dumbassesnews) April 15, 2016
— Sebon Hundley Jr (@mrSeabo) April 15, 2016
As for this latest case out of Florida, William Timothy Anderson Thomas has been charged with burglary and criminal mischief. Do you think masturbation and loud music really led to this man’s alleged rampage? Or could some other culprit — such as drug use or mental illness — have played a role in last week’s destructive incident? No reports are indicating whether or not this Florida man has a prior arrest record, so it’s impossible to determine what his crime history — if any — could determine about this latest event.
[Photo via Pinellas County Sheriff]