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Amy Schumer Wants to Have Sex With Who? Guess The A-List ‘Batman’ She Has A Huge Crush On

By Patricia Grannum
Published on: 06:35 PST, Jan 5, 2016

Amy Schumer has a huge Hollywood crush, and she’s not ashamed to tell everyone about it. The object of her affection? Christian Bale — and she’ll have him at any cost.

“I have a crush on Christian Bale. Newsies was a really big deal to me… I definitely wanted to have sex with him when he was emaciated in The Machinist,” Schumer said in an interview with W Magazine. “I’ll take Christian any way I can get him.”

The comedian appears in W’s February Best Performances issue, on newsstands January 12. She appears alongside other celebrated performers Cate Blanchett, Jane Fonda, Eddie Redmayne, and Bradley Cooper.

Even though Schumer says that she wants to do Christian Bale, she seems destined to settle down with another talented actor — Jennifer Lawrence.

In an interview with Glamour Magazine, Lawrence talked about her and Amy’s plans to grew old and grey together in Martha’s Vineyard.

“Anyway, Amy’s always wanted to live on Martha’s Vineyard, and we saw this house, and we’re like, ‘This is where we’re gonna Grey Gardens, and we’re gonna grow old and crazy together,’ ” she said during the interview. “That’s our life plan.”

On the topic of the Jennifer Lawrence/Amy Schumer relationship, their long awaited buddy comedy is getting closer to being a reality. According to Jennifer, the “politically incorrect” first draft is done. Now there’s just the small matter of finding the time to really work on it.

“That is done. We have finished writing it,” Lawrence told BBC 6 Music (via Entertainment Weekly) “We have an official first draft. I am going to try and fit that somewhere into my ghoulish schedule. We’re going to try to do that pretty soon.”

The screenwriting process has been a blast, Jennifer says.

“It was hilarious because when you’re writing a comedy, it’s not good enough unless you’re laughing out loud,” Lawrence said of working on the script. “I think we got a pretty funny, good movie.”

Jennifer Lawrence has an interesting Hollywood crush of her own: Larry David, an actor famous for his role on Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Lawrence opened up about her attraction to the actor during an interview on Late Night With Seth Meyers last year, Zap2It.com reports.

“I texted Amy [Schumer] the other night because I was drinking wine. I wrote to her, cause I was randomly watching ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm,’ ‘I have so many sexual and boyfriend/marriage feelings about Larry David. I feel like I’m going to be sick,’ ” she reveals.

She was even more explicit in her Glamour interview about her feelings for Larry. Here’s an excerpt from the interview where she talked about him.

“JL: I gave Larry David my number. And he never called. [Laughs.]
CL [Glamour editor-in-chief Cindi Leive]: He might have been like, “That chick is 40 years younger than me. I’m not calling her.” He has a moral compass.
JL: Which makes him even more attractive. I love that he didn’t call me. It makes him so much hotter.
CL: Have you seen his Bernie Sanders impression [on Saturday Night Live]?
JL: Yes! I masturbated to it. [Laughs.] Joking. Obviously didn’t.”

When’s she not fantasizing about Christian Bale or starring in buddy movies with Jennifer Lawrence, Amy Schumer still does her stand up. At one of her last gigs, she even started playing the drums, much to the delight of the audience at the small venue, TMZ reports. She’s also nominated for a Golden Globe in the Best Actress in a Comedy category, alongside her good and friend and future life-partner, Jennifer Lawrence.

In a great display of friendly camaraderie, Lawrence says she hopes Schumer wins the Golden Globe.

“I genuinely don’t want it,” Lawrence said of the award during an interview with Vanity Fair. “I would love to see her [Amy’s] sweet a** up on that stage.”

[Photo by Scott Legato/Getty Images]

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