Macklemore On Drug Relapse: ‘I Was Burnt Out’ And ‘Super-Stressed’

Rapper Macklemore opened up about his struggles with drug abuse and relapse in a recent interview.

In the August-September, 2015, issue of Complex magazine, the 32-year-old rapper expressed that he does not feel very different than a much younger version of himself.

“I don’t feel like I’m grown up. I feel like I’m a kid. I feel like I’m the 15-year-old kid down the street, trying to escape, get out of class, smoke weed in the street, and kick it. And that’s a version of myself that I don’t feel that far removed from.”

According to the report, Macklemore backpedaled to his past drug abuse problems after he and Ryan Lewis went back to Seattle to work on new music.

While focusing on creating a follow-up to the 2012 surprise hit album, The Heist, Macklemore apparently struggled with smoking marijuana and taking pills.

Macklemore, born Ben Haggerty, explained the decline of his backwards journey — including how the stressful burden placed on his shoulders as a touring rapper with chart-topping hits played a major role.

“Eventually, I stopped going to my 12-step meetings. I was burnt out. I was super-stressed. We weren’t sleeping — doing a show every day, zigzagging all over the country. In terms of the media I was getting put into a box that I never saw for myself. The pressure and the fame — everything. All the clichés, man — like not being able to walk around, having no privacy, and from this TV appearance to this TV appearance, and the criticism, and the lack of connection, and the lack of meetings — all of that put into one pie was just … I just wanted to escape.”

The “Can’t Hold Us” rapper admitted that he even reached a point of bargaining with his journey towards sobriety — finding “sneaky” and “deceitful” ways to put off his decision to stop smoking weed day after day and bag after bag.

However, he states that the life-changing moment which was a major wake-up call for him occurred last September, when he received some life-changing news about his fiancée, Tricia Davis.

“Since I heard that Tricia was pregnant, I was like, ‘I need to grow up right now.’ The sobriety was the wake-up call that I needed. And, as it always works, the minute that I start actively seeking recovery — not just sobriety, but recovery — music is there. It always has been. Songs write themselves. My work ethic turns off-to-on in a second and I get happy again. I get grateful again.”

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis skyrocketed up the charts with their debut studio album, The Heist, which was released in October, 2012. The rap duo was able to generate several chart-topping singles from that one album — including “Thrift Shop,” “Can’t Hold Us,” and “Same Love.”

[Image Credit: Bryan Steffy / Getty Images]

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