Perry Cohen was only 14 years old when he and his friend Austin Stephanos, left the coast of Florida for a fishing trip in the Atlantic Ocean. However, what Phil Cohen, Perry’s father did not know was it was the last day that he would ever see his son. On July 24, 2015, Perry and his friend did go on that fishing trip but never came back.
As reported by PEOPLE, “They were last seen departing from the Jib Yacht Club and Marina in Jupiter Inlet Colony. Later that day, they were reported missing.” An extensive search was then conducted that covered around 50,000 square nautical miles from Jupiter to the North Carolina coast, but the boys could not be found.
Phil was devastated to say the least. Talking about what it felt at that time, he said to PEOPLE, “But at first, it absolutely destroyed me. Just completely. I had no idea what to do. The only people I’ve lost to this point were my grandparents. Didn’t really know them well, so I didn’t know grief. Then all of a sudden, I lost the most precious person in the world.”
Moreover, the fact that he had no idea what happened to his son, made things even more difficult for him. Phil said, “When things like this happen, your brain has to make some kind of story. “I didn’t know. Did he get hit in the head when the boat flipped over and just drown right there?… Did he float until he couldn’t anymore? Did he suffer? Did he get eaten by a shark?”
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He then added, “For a parent to have to even think about their child in any of these scenarios is ridiculous.” However, as he was getting drowned in grief, his oldest brother Rich asked him to go to the beach. Phil was totally averse to the idea given the situation he was in but then he felt like Perry’s voice asked him to do the same and that was it for him.
Phil recounted that day on his social media platform where he goes by the name of The Grief Guy. On this platform, he transparently shares his journey through this profound loss and helps millions of people to do the same.
Talking about how grief works, Phil said, “It’s funny how your body remembers. You start to feel certain things… Even though I recognize them, you still feel them.” He further added, “I actually felt better going through that… This whole grief thing, you can’t outrun it.”
With Perry having been gone for 10 years, Phil continues this journey of healing with his online community that he has built. The community and the work Phil does, not only respects Perry and his memory but also helps millions of other people in similar situations to go through their grief with a sense of belonging and the feeling of being seen.
