Advancements in digital sex have made romance easy to achieve, but it’s an isolated practice. A physical connection provides a level of safety and intimacy that electronic developments cannot match. As the offerings outpace our existing boundaries and parameters, questions arise concerning the nature of virtual sex, the definition of infidelity, and the possibility of maintaining a satisfying intimate relationship without virtual assistance.
Many people find the modern dating scene both awkward and uncomfortable. Is it possible to overcome the problem by having sex with someone you don’t know – and will never know? Virtual sex on the internet is no longer unusual, and sites providing that option are proliferating at a surprising rate.
For example, a website called Red Light Center claims to have 2 million users. While the site looks pretty crude, it still seems to satisfy those who have signed up for “virtual sex.” People are represented by avatars and can browse the site for anything from interactive pornography to ” avatar sex” with another member.
The question is, are all these technological advances creating something truly new, or do they simply allow existing impulses to escalate? What about infidelity? The new technology is blurring the definition of what constitutes cheating. If your partner is watching pornography in private, that’s probably inside the boundary for most. But where do you draw the line on interactive pornography? For example, some would claim that phone sex with a prerecorded chatline is only pornography, but phone sex with another person is infidelity.
Different virtual sex websites offer different experiences. There are digital sites where your avatar has sex with a robot, but other sites offer sex with an avatar controlled by a human being. Do you think there is a distinction?
Sam Leith, writing in The Guardian last month, points out that there are even places on the web that can bring you to orgasm by remote control, and asks: “Does that count as cheating?” The remote-sex technologies sometimes called “teledildonics” are already with us. They range from vibrators that can be attached to a computer or gaming machine, to self-lubricating artificial vaginas that can be operated by someone from anywhere in the world.
Bryan Paul from Indiana University says, “We really are on the cusp of being able to have virtual sex that is damn close to the real thing.”
And, as if to emphasize how rapidly the options are developing, a company called Fleshlight, which makes artificial vaginas, has developed an iPad case that is a receptacle for more than just an Apple tablet. The case contains a special slot to accommodate one of their vaginas. The idea is that you can avail yourself of the product while watching naughty films on the screen.
For those who find that the concept and practice of cybersex is not a turn on, there are always dating sites. These have also become extremely sophisticated in catering to every possible relationship option you could think of, and many that you wouldn’t believe.
Perhaps the greatest growth area has been in sites that cater for people who are not seeking a permanent relationship or marriage, but are simply looking for casual sex without commitment. Some of the most popular sites target people who are married but want some variety in the sex department. Ashley Madison is the name of one of the largest sites based in the U.K. – and its clients are mainly women.
The idea for such a specific market came to the founder, 43-year-old former sports lawyer Noel Biderman, in a “Eureka” moment. He explains, “Where we planted our flag was around female infidelity. We believed that the internet was going to foster a whole new era in that regard.” The site now has over 25 million members, which begs the question: Are there any wives left in the U.K. who are NOT cheating?
What conclusions can we come to regarding the benefits and disadvantages of digital sex compared to sex the old-fashioned way?
For many people, even most people, sex is a tactile experience. It’s not ALL about penetration and orgasm. It has much more to do with stroking, hugging, and human contact; basically it’s the feeling of being wanted. The problem for men is that often the mind makes a contract that the body is unable to fulfill.
However, in today’s world, that is no longer a problem, with products like Rexavar on the market claiming to improve the experience of sex and intimacy (for those who still want a face-to-face experience, that is). Rexavar is a new line of male-enhancement products that focuses on improving the sex lives of users and partners of users. But is it an effective way to have more satisfying sex? We asked Tommy Gunn, a six-time AVN award-winning adult actor, about his own experience.
Tommy said, “As someone who has built a career around my physical appearance, I put a huge amount of effort into making my body into the best physical specimen it can be. To gain muscles and take care of them, I exercise religiously, take muscle building supplements, and eat right. Likewise, to get bigger and take care of my penis, I take Rexavar and use a regimen of skin creams to keep it looking perfect for that next close up shot.”
In Tommy’s line of work, a combination of appearance and good performance on a regular basis is critical, which is why Rexavar is (he claims) so essential to his regimen.
In the end, modern men and women have a new world of sexual options at their disposal. Whether it comes in the form of an enhancement-assisted physical encounter or a web-only interface with a user thousands of miles away, it’s clear that sexual satisfaction can be found in more ways than ever.
Main image: www.theguardian.com