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Bono: ‘I’m An Insufferable Jumped-Up Jesus’

Bono U2

Bono has labelled himself as an “insufferable jumped-up Jesus,” as he gave a speech about world poverty.

Speaking at the TED, which stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design, conference in Southern California, the U2 lead singer also called himself a “nerd.” Bono also revealed that he thought technology might eliminate extreme poverty by 2030.

Speaking to an invited crowd Bono stated, “Forget the rock opera. Forget the bombast. The only thing singing today is the facts. I have truly embraced my inner nerd. Exit the rock star. Enter the evidence-based activist. The factavist.”

In the audience at the event was Bill Gates, who listened to Bono reveal that the deaths from Malaria have dropped and that more people with AIDS are being saved with treatment too. The singer also stated that 7,256 fewer children died each days than ten years ago.

However, Bono was quick to warn people, saying, “The rate is still too high, but it is mind-blowing, heart-stopping stuff. If we get to the Zero Zone, for number crunchers like us, that is the erogenous zone. I am sexually aroused by the collating of data,” in a rather peculiar manner.

Bono even managed to make a joke at the event, saying that his own personal target to eradicate extreme poverty in 2030 was “only three Rolling Stone farewell concerts away.”

However, he stated that this could only be achieved if people kept up the pressure on governments to invest in research techniques to tackle poverty.

Bono is still hard at work on his day job, as U2 are working on their 13th album which, they confirmed, will be released when it is ready.

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