Jessa Duggar has some relationship advice for all the single ladies out there: Choose your future spouse carefully, because he’s not going to change his behavior for you. This is probably not something that her sister-in-law, Anna Duggar, wants to hear after being cheated on by her husband of eight years.
During a recent interview with Crown of Beauty Magazine, Jessa Duggar was asked to share some advice for young Christian women who are patiently waiting on God to send a Prince Charming their way. The Counting On star urged her fans to carefully vet their potential suitors, and she cautioned them not to settle for a guy with major character issues in hopes that he’ll eventually quit behaving badly.
“We cannot expect to change a man, nor should we think that character issues will fade away in a day and that a lazy, self-centered man will somehow morph into husband of the year!” Jessa said. “Not to say that a prospective husband must be perfect, but you will know a tree by its fruits.”
This advice will likely raise some eyebrows because the Duggar family doesn’t want the world to know Josh Duggar by his fruits; they want their fans to believe that Josh has succeeded in altering his behavior. After Josh confessed to sexually molesting Jessa Duggar and three other younger sisters as a teen, Anna revealed that she knew about his dark past when she agreed to marry him. However, she praised her husband for “changing the direction of his life” and “doing what is right.”
“I want to say thank you to those who took time over a decade ago to help Josh in a time of crisis,” Anna wrote on the Duggar family’s Facebook page. “Your investment changed his life from going down the wrong path to doing what is right. If it weren’t for your help I would not be here as his wife — celebrating 6 1/2 years of marriage to a man who knows how to be a gentleman and treat a girl right.”
A few months after Anna Duggar wrote those words, Josh confessed to cheating her and being addicted to internet pornography. This revelation didn’t just hurt Anna; Jessa was also devastated to discover that her older brother was hiding these secrets from his family while they were fiercely defending him. As People reports, Jessa and Jill Duggar both appeared on The Kelly File to downplay what their brother did to them when they were little girls. However, Jessa didn’t jump to Josh’s defense after he came clean about being unfaithful to Anna.
As Radar Online reports, Jessa Duggar responded to her brother’s cheating confession by sharing a blog post written by her father-in-law, Michael Seewald, on her Facebook page. Seewald harshly criticized Josh in the blog post, but his biggest concern was not Anna’s feelings; he was more worried about Josh giving other Christians a bad name.
“It distresses me to say that Josh Duggar’s greatest sin is a byproduct of the sum total of his secretly sinful lifestyle,” Seewald wrote. “That is, that by his hypocrisy, he blasphemed the name of God. He claimed to be a Christian, but by his deeds he has suggested otherwise.”
So does Jessa Duggar believe that her older brother can’t change? She didn’t share her feelings about Josh’s sex scandals during her Crown of Beauty interview, but she did reveal that her mother also thinks that men can’t change. According to Jessa, Michelle Duggar once dated a man who didn’t share her religious beliefs. Instead of trying to convert him, the former 19 Kids and Counting star kicked him to the curb.
“My mom tells that story that when she gave her life to Christ in her teen years, she knew she would have to break up with her boyfriend who didn’t care anything about her newfound faith,” Jessa said. “Though she knew it was the right thing to do, that didn’t make it easy.”
Josh Duggar certainly hasn’t lived up to Anna’s expectations of what a godly man should be, but she hasn’t eliminated him from her life. Instead of accepting that he won’t change, she’s decided to keep hoping and praying that he will. As the Inquisitr previously reported, she and Josh are expecting their fifth child, and some fans are concerned that the couple believes that a “Band-aid baby” will save their struggling marriage.
Do you think Anna Duggar would be better off if she listened to Jessa’s advice and gave up on Josh changing for her? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
[Featured Image by Jessa Duggar/Instagram]