Romney’s ‘Binders Full Of Women’ Comment Sparks Hilarious Amazon ‘Reviews’
Now that we’ve seen it, it seems almost inevitable that the good people who leave hilarious comments on Amazon would take Mitt Romney’s “binders full of women” comment and run with it, convening on a page for Avery binders and doing what they do when taking over a product’s reviews.
Amazon’s “binders full of women” reviews call to mind the special lady pens introduced by Bic, and the scads of hilarious comments purporting to be from women so unfamiliar with pens they’ve mistaken it for a tampon, men who accidentally used a lady pen by Bic and were traumatized or otherwise upset by the experience, and women who have understandably never used pens before because all prior pens were marketed to men only. It was funny.
Somehow, Mitt’s “binders full of women” reviews on Amazon attached to the Avery Durable View Binder with 2 Inch EZ-Turn Ring, and the mock reviews are much in the same vein as those for milk on Amazon (“at $50 a gallon it costs only $679 to fill up my tank and my car is running like a dream!”) and that of yellow cake (“try as I might, I could never get this stuff to enrich to fully weapons-grade”), incorporating Romney’s remarks into the review’s focus.
Here is a sampling of Romney’s “binders full of women” reviews on Amazon:
“For any of you who might be considering, like me, purchasing this binder based on the reviews, let me just point out one glaring omission: While this is a lovely, multi-purpose binder, IT DOES NOT COME WITH WOMEN. Presumably one is expected to find women on one’s own, or contact women’s groups who are supposedly eager to help stock your empty binder with women.”
And this, titled “Not As Useful As The Trap Her, Keep Her” on the reviews page:
“Maybe it’s just my women, but they don’t seem to want to fit into the space I’ve designated for them in this binder. They keep sticking out over the edges, even getting away in some cases. I thought using clear, glass-ceiling page protectors would help, but it doesn’t seem to slow them down anymore … I’m going to have to resort to more severe three-hole punching, to keep my women in line. And maybe switch to the Trap Her, Keep Her.”
Another reviewer expresses concerns about her ability to return home in time to make dinner:
“As a woman, I’m not adept at making decisions that concern me. So when I need the right choice, I turn to the presidential candidate that KNOWS. One with prideful experience in this department. I don’t want to be filed away in an inferior & confusing electronic doohickey that I couldn’t possibly understand. Or heaven forbid, have a man ask for & listen to my ideas! I’d much rather rely on this top of the line, 1980s style, Avery Durable binder. It’s the choice America can trust. My education, my ideas, my opinions, my choices, please PLEASE keep them safely stored away here and far away from the men that might fear them (I mean, want to use them to hire me somedaynever). I’d write more about this most useful product, but it’s time I hurry home to make dinner.”
Thankfully, another reviewer confirms that the binder actually helps with all your womanly duties:
“As a wife and mother, I LOVE this binder. It keeps me in my place, allows me to get dinner ready on time, AND only costs 72% of the more masculine version. Some people might think it’s sexist, but sheesh, I’m not binding my feet, just my brain. Extra bonus, if you sit on it just right, it can act as an effective method of birth control! Full disclosure: I submitted this under my husband’s account, with his full permission. He is the head of our household, and the owner of the binder.”
You can read the reviews on Amazon for binders full of women over on the site.