All-Autism Wedding Ceremony: Autistic Couple Marry In First All-Autism Wedding Ceremony

An all-autism wedding ceremony took place in San Diego, California, on Sunday when Anita Lesko and Abraham Talmage Nielsen got married before their family and friends. The couple and their entire wedding party were comprised of autistic individuals.

Fox News reports that the autism wedding ceremony had 185 people in attendance.

Everyone involved in the nuptials was identified as being on the spectrum of autism, which is a very broad spectrum. All of the planning and organizing were done by some very determined and highly intelligent people who face a series of challenges developmentally when it comes to social, communication, and behavioral traits.

The wedding of Anita and Abraham was held during the second annual Love & Autism: A Conference with Heart event.

Dr. Jenny Palmiotto, the founder of the Love & Autism conference, says that “love is part of the human experience, and this doesn’t change with neurological differences associated with autism. We wanted to bring to light these relationship issues.”

Anita, 56, is a certified registered nurse anesthesiologist and was planning to speak at the conference, but had a great idea and emailed Palmiotto about it. She asked her if she and Abraham, 28, could have their wedding at the event as well. She was thrilled at the notion and agreed to make it the venue that everyone could share in. The message was meant to show that, yes, autistic people and love do co-exist.

Palmiotto, also the director and CEO of The Family Guidance & Therapy Center of Southern California, explains that from her experience of working with people on the spectrum, they are no different than average people when it comes to love and relationships.

“It must be so different to live in a world where people assume that … you are inept or incapable of having a relationship, or maybe even don’t want one. That’s really contrary to my clinical practice and even all of the available relational research to date.”

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports that about 1 in 68 children have been identified with Autism Spectrum Disorder.

So, what’s the history behind this autistic couple who just got married? Anita met Abraham six years ago at an autism/Asperger’s group that she started after she was diagnosed on the spectrum at the age 50. She was relieved to learn what disorder she had because she knew something separated her from others. She experienced loneliness and an inability to maintain relationships.

Within a year, Anita and Abraham had a blossoming friendship. Anita was Abraham’s first real friend. He was a draftsman and eventually earned a cybersecurity clearance certificate. To celebrate the achievement, Anita took him out to dinner. That was Abraham’s chance to make the dinner “romantic.”

Way before the all-autism wedding was even on the radar, Palmiotto says that Abraham developed feelings for Anita but “pushed them down.” He thought, “If I play this card and I fail, I lose my best friend, too.”

The couple from Pensacola, Florida, told Palmiotto that in spite of the large age difference, finding someone you can trust and depend on for the first time makes it irrelevant. Palmiotto adds that both have told her “that for two people who felt so alone, isolated, socially excluded, finding each other felt like they both walked in each other’s shoes.”

Those in the all-autism wedding ceremony included the groomsman, ushers, flower girls, ring bearer, officiant, DJ, classical harpist, and a wedding cake baker.

Temple Grandin — a famous autism activist, innovator, and best-selling author — made a special video message for Anita and Abraham. Temple also told Anita that “your wedding is so important to the autism community because it shows that positive relationships are possible.”

The life-changing event also showed the world how those on the spectrum can fully support one another. As Palmiotto explains, so often discussions are around supporting people with autism, but the autism wedding ceremony showed how “great people [stand] up for and beside their friends.”

As for the all-autism wedding ceremony, it’s getting rock star attention due to its milestone significance. Palmiotto saw firsthand how social people on the spectrum really are, but are often misunderstood.

“Looking at all these [wedding] participants dancing, socializing, we could hardly get them out of the hall. People on the spectrum are social beings. Relationships are core, from the cradle to the grave, and that is very true as well for people with autism.”

More photos of the first all-autism wedding can be viewed here.

[Photo Credit: YouTube screenshot]