inquisitrlogo

 
Zombie Apocalypse is Nigh? Blog Post Lays Out the Evidence

Posted: May 30, 2012
Zombie Apocalypse is Nigh? Blog Post Lays Out the Evidence

zombie apocalypse

A zombie apocalypse is almost permanently on the lips and keyboards of web users worldwide, and for some reason the trope of impending armageddon is one that remains firmly entrenched in our collective psyche.

Zombie apocalypse is just one doomsday scenario of many that we consider (nuclear accident, plague and pestilence, or the election of Donald Trump to public office are other potential world-ending precipitates), and despite its relative implausibility, it’s one to which we return to plan our arsenal, bug out bag, escape route, and potential and sex-guaranteeing rescue of an object of our affection. (See Shaun of the Dead.)

So it was with no small measure of nervous giggling a series of zombie apocalypse-esque stories have been trending on social media in recent weeks, and despite the gruesome nature of many, Facebook and Twitter users can’t help but make references to the seemingly imminent arrival of Z-Day.

The most zombieriffic story to trend this week of course was that of the face-eater in Miami who continued eating a man’s face even after he was shot once by police, police who presumably have watched Zombieland and know to double-tap.

Then there was the man in New Jersey who began throwing bits of his own entrails at police officers, and was not subdued by pepper spray.

Pepper Spray Police Placed On Leave

Two stories that really do sound like the start of Jersey Shore of the Dead to be sure, but wait, there’s more. Also in Florida, a doctor was arrested and began spitting blood at the officers taking him into custody, also impervious to standard methods of restraint.

Also, there is the radioactive sushi. I don’t know about you guys, but if a police chief that looks like George Romero gets on the news and tells me that reports that the dead have begun walking are internet rumors, I’m stocking up on baseball bats and scythes and heading up to Woodstock, who’s with me?

You can read a collection of all this month’s terrifying, zombie apocalypse signaling news over at this guy’s blog, via Gawker.



Comments


340 Archived Responses to “ Zombie Apocalypse is Nigh? Blog Post Lays Out the Evidence ”

  1. Zombie Apocaplyse huh? Well zombies have been commuting everyday for the last 20years in NYC…what's the difference hmmm.

  2. Who beileve this zombie bullcrap I don't think that could hppens only God knows when the end come amen.

  3. Jessica Acissej
    May 30, 2012
  4. This guy haha and his religion

  5. Tuna Tangor
    May 30, 2012

    I'm so looking forward to the zombie apocalypse, gona go on a zombie killing spree.

  6. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    What is the deal with zombies are people that dumb?

  7. what b.s.

  8. Ever heard of sarcasm? How about the concept of humor?

  9. Again, it's called HUMOR. If you took this article serious what's the deal with you? Are you that dumb?

  10. If they are worried about Zombies, They should see me when I wake up of a morning.

  11. Reading these comments leads me to believe that Zombies can talk and type…Let me help out the masses that don't get it. This article is a JOKE! It's a clever play on current events to elicit a hearty chuckle from the readers…not to be taken seriously! Good Lord people live a little! Life is supposed to be fun at times!

  12. time to pack myself w bats, guns, and and machetes, cuz its going to get messy! haha!

  13. Patrick Jay Salazar
    May 30, 2012

    your right only god knows when the end is here but we dont, so how do you know this isnt it

  14. I am glad I am a good marksman. I will protect all you gus for a reasonable fee…..

  15. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012
  16. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 30, 2012

    7 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Outbreak Would Fail (Quickly).

    #7. They Have Too Many Natural Predators.
    #6. They Can't Take the Heat.
    #5. They Can't Handle the Cold.
    #4. Biting is a Terrible Way to Spread a Disease.
    #3. They Can't Heal from Day to Day Damage.
    #2. The Landscape is Full of Zombie-Proof Barriers.
    #1. Weapons and the People Who Use Them.

  17. Some people just wont ever get it…ever

  18. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  19. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  20. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  21. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  22. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  23. nope, he didn't get the memo.

  24. You are assuming that the disease would be spread only by biting? What if it were an airborne disease affecting thousands daily. The spread wouldn't be controllable.

  25. Shitara Lennon
    May 30, 2012

    Jesus was technically a zombie. think about it….

  26. Somebody reads Cracked…

  27. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    "I wonder if this has anything to do with the "Facebook stock" dive"? "Talk about saving FACE"! "I think I'll take my picture down, just in case"! "Have some more drugs, assholes"!

  28. Chris Weihert
    May 30, 2012

    (rolling eyes) Here we go again. It's just like a year ago.

  29. Ethelwaldo Arocho
    May 30, 2012

    A Zombie apocalypse is more likely executed among "Lipstick anarchists, Anti-War, Occupiers, Union members, Environmentalists, Bonafied Communists and Progressives hell-bent in world homologation, equality and domination" as groups like these have an historically proven way of moving large groups of people in sometimes violent ways. Current examples like riots in Greece, France, Occupy Wall St. are evidence that "Zombies" don't have to eat your flesh but act in a collective manner in which can figuratively "eat the brains of others" and let's say protest violently if "they don't get their way" or loose their "messiah" in the White House. Hence to be prepared for such is not so crazy as people may think as large demonstrations like these can disrupt the distribuition of food and essential supplies that come into cities daily causing further public upheaval. Think Mob Mentality!

  30. I'm ready. Have a 3rd floor apartment and I can see all around me. Don't think anything can get up here lol.

  31. Hahaha. You know the trade off between zombie popularity and vampire popularity, right? Vamps typically get popular when Democrats are in office: Cruel, beautiful, hedonistic, full of self-importance. Zombies get popular when Republicans get in: "The unwashed masses", so to speak, mindless, tattered, and always starving.

  32. Multi-level apartments are death traps.

  33. idiot

  34. I wonder; if zombies are dead, but ther're always eating. Do they ever get full, or poop?

  35. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    People live in a fantasy land after watching too many Zombie movies. It would never be like that anyway, because real people are far smarter than the idiotic characters portrayed in the movies. A real life 5 year old could easily evade zombies, but the adults in the movies always seem to be outsmarted by the brainless walking dead.

  36. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    People live in a fantasy land after watching too many Zombie movies. It would never be like that anyway, because real people are far smarter than the idiotic characters portrayed in the movies. A real life 5 year old could easily evade zombies, but the adults in the movies always seem to be outsmarted by the brainless walking dead.

  37. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    People live in a fantasy land after watching too many Zombie movies. It would never be like that anyway, because real people are far smarter than the idiotic characters portrayed in the movies. A real life 5 year old could easily evade zombies, but the adults in the movies always seem to be outsmarted by the brainless walking dead.

  38. I live in NYC all my life, 44 years, and, Rodney, I agree with 100%. I've been seeing the same thing over the last decade. No one is getting their faces chewed off, but people are devouring each other in different ways. Good post Rodney.

  39. I live in NYC all my life, 44 years, and, Rodney, I agree with 100%. I've been seeing the same thing over the last decade. No one is getting their faces chewed off, but people are devouring each other in different ways. Good post Rodney.

  40. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    http://zaico.com/ Better get some Zombie Insurance. :)

  41. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    http://zaico.com/ Better get some Zombie Insurance. :)

  42. zombie APOCALYPSE is no joking matter; especially if it turns out to be something more like 28 days later; or cabin fever. Madness because of food shortages can bring the worst out of westerners; unfortunately; it would only take an Katrina LA riot situation for the worst in humanity to show up. In china they are already forcing abortions in N Korea they are already executing people for cannibalism. That could be everyone; cause everyone will become a zombie to you eventually; if they want what you have and desire to take it without asking.

  43. zombie APOCALYPSE is no joking matter; especially if it turns out to be something more like 28 days later; or cabin fever. Madness because of food shortages can bring the worst out of westerners; unfortunately; it would only take an Katrina LA riot situation for the worst in humanity to show up. In china they are already forcing abortions in N Korea they are already executing people for cannibalism. That could be everyone; cause everyone will become a zombie to you eventually; if they want what you have and desire to take it without asking.

  44. zombie APOCALYPSE is no joking matter; especially if it turns out to be something more like 28 days later; or cabin fever. Madness because of food shortages can bring the worst out of westerners; unfortunately; it would only take an Katrina LA riot situation for the worst in humanity to show up. In china they are already forcing abortions in N Korea they are already executing people for cannibalism. That could be everyone; cause everyone will become a zombie to you eventually; if they want what you have and desire to take it without asking.

  45. zombie APOCALYPSE is no joking matter; especially if it turns out to be something more like 28 days later; or cabin fever. Madness because of food shortages can bring the worst out of westerners; unfortunately; it would only take an Katrina LA riot situation for the worst in humanity to show up. In china they are already forcing abortions in N Korea they are already executing people for cannibalism. That could be everyone; cause everyone will become a zombie to you eventually; if they want what you have and desire to take it without asking.

  46. Charlie Kirkpatrick
    May 30, 2012

    The reason most people around the world believe in a future reality that includes Apocalypse and Armageddon is, (We Are Living In Self Destruct Mode,) and if we don't Change The Status Quo all will be lost but there is still hope. We still have time to turn this thing around. So for the sake of our children, and for generations to come (Don't Live In Self Destruct Mode.) Find Out What We Can Do To Change The Status Quo and Not End Up With Humanity Living In A Road-Side Ditch and Doomed. Please See: http://www.worldpeacecode.com.

  47. Charlie Kirkpatrick
    May 30, 2012

    The reason most people around the world believe in a future reality that includes Apocalypse and Armageddon is, (We Are Living In Self Destruct Mode,) and if we don't Change The Status Quo all will be lost but there is still hope. We still have time to turn this thing around. So for the sake of our children, and for generations to come (Don't Live In Self Destruct Mode.) Find Out What We Can Do To Change The Status Quo and Not End Up With Humanity Living In A Road-Side Ditch and Doomed. Please See: http://www.worldpeacecode.com.

  48. Charlie Kirkpatrick
    May 30, 2012

    The reason most people around the world believe in a future reality that includes Apocalypse and Armageddon is, (We Are Living In Self Destruct Mode,) and if we don't Change The Status Quo all will be lost but there is still hope. We still have time to turn this thing around. So for the sake of our children, and for generations to come (Don't Live In Self Destruct Mode.) Find Out What We Can Do To Change The Status Quo and Not End Up With Humanity Living In A Road-Side Ditch and Doomed. Please See: http://www.worldpeacecode.com.

  49. Charlie Kirkpatrick
    May 30, 2012

    The reason most people around the world believe in a future reality that includes Apocalypse and Armageddon is, (We Are Living In Self Destruct Mode,) and if we don't Change The Status Quo all will be lost but there is still hope. We still have time to turn this thing around. So for the sake of our children, and for generations to come (Don't Live In Self Destruct Mode.) Find Out What We Can Do To Change The Status Quo and Not End Up With Humanity Living In A Road-Side Ditch and Doomed. Please See: http://www.worldpeacecode.com.

  50. zombo apocalypse? AAAAAAAAAH! I think I saw one walking down the street the other day. it's true! I saw it! oh well, my home town here is full of zombos so I'm used to it. and boy do they smell bad.

    wasn't it Criswell who predicted a zombo apocky in Pittsburgh back in the 50's. when we were kids there was a book of Criswell predictions we had and it predicted it would happen in the 70's or 80's. AAAAAAAAAH!

  51. Let's clean up Washington D.C.

  52. I agree with you that the true "zombies" of society don't eat our flesh. They devour us in other ways and methods. But you left out the politicians and rich men during the Bush Administration who devoured the U.S. Treasury and drove the dollar down. Who also deceived people into unnecessary wars against the Middle East, Who use the real WMDs, which are greed, power and control. The Zombies of propaganda and media who strive to manipulate the mindset and functions of human societies. Those, my friend, are the real zombies. And those who are brainwashed by their policies are their meals. Those who steer their nation toward immorality, Welfare, confiscated taxation, the pursuit of materialistic wealth, the abandonment of religion, the destruction of the Middle Class, and that God is dead and men are supreme are the real Zombie state of our society. Movements like OWS and others are only "reactions" to sinister "actions" by evil and selfish men bent on leading our world into its own apocalypse.

  53. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    Stephen Mandel Joseph actually there is people getting their face chewed off

  54. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    Jesus christ, be mature about this. We're talking about actual medical conditions, not your unhappiness with the majority of society.

  55. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012
  56. ehh bring em on I played my fair share of Black Ops.

  57. Ok so I'm a little worried , everyone keeps talking about this Zombie Apocolypse! I think I have a Zombie dog because she sleeps with her eyes open.

  58. the guy in florida didn't eat the victims goatee. It would seem the more hairy you are, the safer you are.

  59. Marie Avena
    May 30, 2012

    if a man can die and come back from the dead then be called the invisible man and be praised and followed by millions of people.. I'm pretty sure there's room in the world for everything else ;D.

  60. I know that, sweet. I read the article of what happened to that homeless guy in Florida. My comment, if you read it, says that not "everyone" is eating flesh physically, some do it mentally. Not all Zombies are physical flesh eaters. Also, a Zombie can refer to a person who is just as "mentally" dead as they are physically dead.

  61. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    What do you mean zombie apocalypse? Zombies make the bulk of our population!

  62. Steve Knueppel
    May 30, 2012

    Of course the poop. Hence the the book "Everybody Poops"

  63. This is the most realistic depiction of a zombie attack I've ever seen http://youtu.be/gcSH-Dqwg2Q.

  64. No. Zombies vomit what they eat. Gives them more room.

  65. That's unnecessary. Jesus rose from the dead. Zombie.

  66. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    Yay The Walking Dead picture! xD

  67. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 30, 2012

    Yes I do.

  68. Can't take the heat or cold? You seriously don't understand zombies do you? They take shots to any part of the body (except the head) and still come at you. I think they'd be able to limp through 100 degree weather. Zombies outbreaks usually occur by an airborne virus. So the moment the outbreak happens, humans are out numbered. Let's see you fend off 100 zombies running after you with a .45.

  69. Can't take the heat or cold? You seriously don't understand zombies do you? They take shots to any part of the body (except the head) and still come at you. I think they'd be able to limp through 100 degree weather. Zombies outbreaks usually occur by an airborne virus. So the moment the outbreak happens, humans are out numbered. Let's see you fend off 100 zombies running after you with a .45.

  70. Can't take the heat or cold? You seriously don't understand zombies do you? They take shots to any part of the body (except the head) and still come at you. I think they'd be able to limp through 100 degree weather. Zombies outbreaks usually occur by an airborne virus. So the moment the outbreak happens, humans are out numbered. Let's see you fend off 100 zombies running after you with a .45.

  71. Can't take the heat or cold? You seriously don't understand zombies do you? They take shots to any part of the body (except the head) and still come at you. I think they'd be able to limp through 100 degree weather. Zombies outbreaks usually occur by an airborne virus. So the moment the outbreak happens, humans are out numbered. Let's see you fend off 100 zombies running after you with a .45.

  72. Also, sweets, when I said "no one was getting their faces chewed off" I was responding to Rodney's comment, referring to the fact that the Zombies we see commuting aren't chewing off faces here in NYC, instead, most of the Zombies here are lost souls who are either spiritually or mentally dead. And those are the worse Zombies out there.

  73. Also, sweets, when I said "no one was getting their faces chewed off" I was responding to Rodney's comment, referring to the fact that the Zombies we see commuting aren't chewing off faces here in NYC, instead, most of the Zombies here are lost souls who are either spiritually or mentally dead. And those are the worse Zombies out there.

  74. Think I need to get some more 12 gauge shells.

  75. I say Happy Zombie Jesus Day. Not Happy Easter

  76. So…zombies are the new bulemics?

  77. Chris Renkert
    May 30, 2012

    The only logical way a "Zombie" could be produced, is if a recently deceased body was taken over by a parasitic life form. The Life form would devour the entire body, and reproduce an exact copy of it. The more it eats, the more it produces. So the [Prototype] approach is logical in most ways, excluding the Tendrils of fear and the Blades of OMFG.

  78. Chris Renkert
    May 30, 2012

    Or Jesus could of just had a really bad trip, and his douchbag friends left him in a hole when he blacked out. Silly Jesus.

  79. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 30, 2012

    You have to understand what a zombie is. It is essentially dead, rotting meat. Take a pound of hamburger and set it outside at 100 degrees and see what happens. It will fester and rot. The point here is that zombies will never happen.

  80. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 30, 2012

    You have to understand what a zombie is. It is essentially dead, rotting meat. Take a pound of hamburger and set it outside at 100 degrees and see what happens. It will fester and rot. The point here is that zombies will never happen.

  81. a zombie outbreak doesnt have to be the end, just an event. who said the world was ending. your god only knows theory is flawed. it can happen… it doesnt mean the end of the world

  82. a zombie outbreak doesnt have to be the end, just an event. who said the world was ending. your god only knows theory is flawed. it can happen… it doesnt mean the end of the world

  83. Chris Renkert
    May 30, 2012

    Only god knows huh? The end of this world is when people realize only they can make themselves truly happy, only then can we achieve Nirvana/Heaven/Free McD's burgers.

  84. Andrew Schwers
    May 30, 2012

    Walmart has the best prices on 12 ga……I'm ready for it

  85. Zombie: Any welfare recipient who is left wandering the streets aimlessly, in search of a free ride, when the government craps out and there is no one left to steal them a check.

  86. Alright, someone show me the way to the mystery box.

  87. Cassandra Mallaber
    May 30, 2012

    It's humor, people! Laugh! Have a few giggles over it! I saw a post on Tumblr similar to this talking about the flood of crazy events over the past few days in Florida. Here's the fantastic response one person had: http://birthrightandburden.tumblr.com/post/24023455306/zombie-apocalypse-coming-soon.

    We've seen WAY too many movies. Like the comedian Paul Mooney said: "People believe what they see". "The Exorcist" came out, people were crowding into church. "Jaws" came out, no one went to the beach. And we can NOT forget that lovely little number that debuted in 1968 that started this whole Zombie ball rolling (if you don't know what movie I'm talking about, leave this page right now heathen!). In closing:

    "They're coming to get you Barbara!"

  88. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    How about the concept of humor? my roomate's ex-wife makes $79/hr on the laptop. She has been out of a job for 9 months but last month her pay was $8641 just working on the laptop for a few hours. Go to this web site CashLazy.*com
    remove the *

  89. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    How about the concept of humor? my roomate's ex-wife makes $79/hr on the laptop. She has been out of a job for 9 months but last month her pay was $8641 just working on the laptop for a few hours. Go to this web site CashLazy.*com
    remove the *

  90. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    How about the concept of humor? my roomate's ex-wife makes $79/hr on the laptop. She has been out of a job for 9 months but last month her pay was $8641 just working on the laptop for a few hours. Go to this web site CashLazy.*com
    remove the *

  91. are you kidding me? guy spits blood at police, must be zombies lol what a joke article.

  92. DID you read the one about the guy eating the other guys face!? that was a trip

  93. Keith Sowulewski
    May 30, 2012

    Since money will be obsolete, i will pay you $10,000.

  94. haha yeah, i saw the security camera footage. apparently people on drugs count as zombies

  95. Edward Eddy Boldt
    May 30, 2012

    lazy ass

  96. Kendra Grubb
    May 30, 2012

    Atleast if the zombie apocaplyse does happen. I wont have to search for a job anymore. :) Just survive.

  97. They said the same thing about the airplane and going to the moon until one day man made it happen. truth is there are several viruses in nature that can alter your thinking. Will you be undead? who knows

  98. I don't think that Jesus was a zombie, but Lazarus? DEFINITELY Lazarus!

  99. Actually, scientific research on zombies has been extremely difficult because the limited outbreaks generally end with total annihilation of the region, and little post-outbreak study. It's still not completely clear if they are, indeed, just rotting dead meat. To assert that they are rotting meat then make conclusions on that assertion is not scientific.

  100. Actually, scientific research on zombies has been extremely difficult because the limited outbreaks generally end with total annihilation of the region, and little post-outbreak study. It's still not completely clear if they are, indeed, just rotting dead meat. To assert that they are rotting meat then make conclusions on that assertion is not scientific.

  101. Actually, scientific research on zombies has been extremely difficult because the limited outbreaks generally end with total annihilation of the region, and little post-outbreak study. It's still not completely clear if they are, indeed, just rotting dead meat. To assert that they are rotting meat then make conclusions on that assertion is not scientific.

  102. Actually, scientific research on zombies has been extremely difficult because the limited outbreaks generally end with total annihilation of the region, and little post-outbreak study. It's still not completely clear if they are, indeed, just rotting dead meat. To assert that they are rotting meat then make conclusions on that assertion is not scientific.

  103. I have seen this on the internet and it entertained me, however, seeing it from a actual writer and taking it seriously with such scattered information and evidence makes me doubt the competence of the media even more.

  104. Are you aware that you just proudly announced your utter lack of humor and imagination to the entire world?

  105. considering a zombie outbreak hasnt happen yet, i doubt an article from cracked is reliable.
    also if cracked was getting their information from zombie movies they already explained why they can take the heat/cold. Biting is effective be cause loved ones will hesitant to kill the infected, also its not the zombies that are the biggest problem it is the people figure they can do what ever they want

  106. Laura Merlyn Klongland, agreed

  107. I think the what you see in 28 Days/Weeks Later is the most plausible "zombie" apocalypse.

  108. that*

  109. I think that what you see in 28 Days/Weeks Later is the most plausible "zombie" apocalypse.

  110. "relative implausibility"?
    RELATIVE IMPLAUSIBILITY?
    I hope you get cancer in your fucking cunt Kim LaCapria, you dumbass wop whore.

  111. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    zombies, aliens New World Order hmmm I wonder….

  112. Chris Greskovich
    May 30, 2012

    meat doesn't rot in an hour…also if we are talking how a virus spreads…bites aren't the only thing you have to worry about…biologically it is far from likely but if nature decides to cross rare strains of rabies with influenza and add a dash of ebola we have pretty much what you would consider a zombie. remember this….some of the worst things man can endure are their own creations.

  113. Max Barna
    May 30, 2012

    Brazilian Nightshade… Look it up… carries Solanium = turns you into the definition of a zombie, maybe not movie worthy or comparable, but by definition your a zombie. Good Luck with your life nonbelievers.

  114. Max Barna
    May 30, 2012

    Brazilian Nightshade… Look it up… carries Solanium = turns you into the definition of a zombie, maybe not movie worthy or comparable, but by definition your a zombie. Good Luck with your life nonbelievers.

  115. Max Barna
    May 30, 2012

    Brazilian Nightshade… Look it up… carries Solanium = turns you into the definition of a zombie, maybe not movie worthy or comparable, but by definition your a zombie. Good Luck with your life nonbelievers.

  116. Max Barna
    May 30, 2012

    Brazilian Nightshade… Look it up… carries Solanium = turns you into the definition of a zombie, maybe not movie worthy or comparable, but by definition your a zombie. Good Luck with your life nonbelievers.

  117. All I need is Instakill and Juggernog! Hahaha jk jk.

  118. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    I say let the zombie apocalypse come maybe there will be less traffic going in and out of Boston. Way to many people in the world.

  119. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    I say let the zombie apocalypse come maybe there will be less traffic going in and out of Boston. Way to many people in the world.

  120. Anonymous
    May 30, 2012

    I say let the zombie apocalypse come maybe there will be less traffic going in and out of Boston. Way to many people in the world.

  121. I wouldn't say these people are zombies; they seem more like cannibals to me.

  122. Natasha Kristina
    May 30, 2012

    I'll meet you at the coast by the Mississipi so we can fight together.

  123. Word round town is zombies lurkin the streetz and yall tellin me.. a nigga dat been playing resident evil , dead rising , left 4 dead…. I'm rdy nigga I always wanted to fuck up a zombie in real life lol.

  124. This doesn't mean zombie apocalypse, this means that there was some sort of rash in a school. A fucking cannibal in Miami.
    and a doctor forgot to wash his hands after helping a patient, and for not acting human? Well they are obviously sick or maybe they just DGAF.

  125. Saw this on cracked :)

  126. Kaylin Elizabeth Stephens
    May 30, 2012

    It depends what climate they are in, I would imagine. Somewhere with a moderate climate year-round (neither extreme of cold or heat) would be a excellent place for zombies to multiply exponentially in a short amount of time. Miami's probably out of the question, unless it starts in the winter there, but England has a climate similar to that. Think Shaun of the Dead without the funny parts.

  127. Kaylin Elizabeth Stephens
    May 31, 2012

    And in some countries it is illegal for regular citizens to own guns in most cases, unlike in the US, which would probably be more well-prepared for zombies in this case.
    Also, it depends what kind of zombie as well. You've got several horror movie varieties to choose from. Fast or slow zombie? Supernatural or scientific cause? Do they only attack humans or any living creature?

    If it's a slow-moving, scientifically caused zombie that only attacks humans, then you're probably gonna be ok. Otherwise, I think we're all fucked.

  128. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 31, 2012

    I think that all of you are taking this WAY to seriously.

  129. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    May 31, 2012

    There are Zombies among us controlled by Satan ;(.

  130. Jesus was the very first hippy! Doesn't anybody else realize this other than myself? LOL Perhaps, I'm just day dreaming again damn it!

  131. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Bring it on. My son and I will enjoy shooting without having to go to the range.

  132. Paul Wilson
    May 31, 2012

    I'll be hacking, chopping and shooting my way to VERY sparsely populated areas too. See y'all in Montana or somewhere.

  133. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    …the zombie apocolypse has begun..just watch Republicans in action…

  134. dush bag

  135. Ivy Asbury
    May 31, 2012

    From what I've read a zombie's once human stomach eventually explodes and they continue to eat trying to satiate their hunger.

  136. See Chris, I think you're going more the way of "The Thing". Ivy what you said is more what I was thinking. My thinking is when it comes to a zombie apocalypse; as long as you are in a safe place with plenty of supplies; you just have to wait it out. After a while they will just rot away. Also unlike the fokes on "The Walking Dead" burn ALL your dead!

  137. See Chris, I think you're going more the way of "The Thing". Ivy what you said is more what I was thinking. My thinking is when it comes to a zombie apocalypse; as long as you are in a safe place with plenty of supplies; you just have to wait it out. After a while they will just rot away. Also unlike the fokes on "The Walking Dead" burn ALL your dead!

  138. See Chris, I think you're going more the way of "The Thing". Ivy what you said is more what I was thinking. My thinking is when it comes to a zombie apocalypse; as long as you are in a safe place with plenty of supplies; you just have to wait it out. After a while they will just rot away. Also unlike the fokes on "The Walking Dead" burn ALL your dead!

  139. See Chris, I think you're going more the way of "The Thing". Ivy what you said is more what I was thinking. My thinking is when it comes to a zombie apocalypse; as long as you are in a safe place with plenty of supplies; you just have to wait it out. After a while they will just rot away. Also unlike the fokes on "The Walking Dead" burn ALL your dead!

  140. Philip Ly
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    But it's fun to speculate. Zombies are walking dead. They defy our laws. Who's to say they aren't affected by temperature?

  141. Philip Ly
    May 31, 2012

    Please don't bring up religion in this. Not everyone follows your religion.

  142. Billy Aten
    May 31, 2012

    It won't be the end of the world… Some of us are prepared lol

  143. Hussle Crowe
    May 31, 2012

    that's cause deep down inside they're really scared, so they need comforting from someone to tell them it's just humor

  144. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 31, 2012

    Maybe, but they are too weak, and they are still dead. Dead=decaying.

  145. Dallas Savage
    May 31, 2012

    Philip i'm with you. and Anthony i highly suggest you should read world war z, if you haven't. Max brooks is brilliant. the only weather that could be effective is the cold. no body heat they would freeze…looks like i'm going further north. lol.

  146. Anthony Giryt LaMarca
    May 31, 2012

    Once again. I think you are all taking this too seriously. Zombies will never roam the earth.

  147. Dallas Savage
    May 31, 2012

    i'm not taking this seriously. i think it makes great for convo.it's fun. take 5 minutes and just have fun with it. also the walking dead consists of all the recent dead coming back to life. not one person at a time. lol. sorry. so yea stopping them would be hard. at first. it would be over in a month. i think. wait. now i'm rambling. crap.

  148. since we now allow anything is our society, I'm sure the government will pass a bill put forward by zombie Klan for peaceful cohabitation by the way zombies and humans………..lmaoo.

  149. since we now allow anything is our society, I'm sure the government will pass a bill put forward by zombie Klan for peaceful cohabitation by the way zombies and humans………..lmaoo.

  150. since we now allow anything is our society, I'm sure the government will pass a bill put forward by zombie Klan for peaceful cohabitation by the way zombies and humans………..lmaoo.

  151. since we now allow anything is our society, I'm sure the government will pass a bill put forward by zombie Klan for peaceful cohabitation by the way zombies and humans………..lmaoo.

  152. You spelled "douche" wrong

  153. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  154. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  155. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  156. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  157. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  158. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  159. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  160. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  161. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  162. While all the northern states and California try to ban guns . At least we texans will have plenty guns for protection :)

  163. If you don't believe in zombies, just check those Democrat rolls in Chicago. They vote every election. And, after voting, they return to the cemetaries…

  164. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  165. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  166. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  167. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  168. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  169. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  170. Watch soon there is gonna be a zombie apocalypse

  171. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  172. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  173. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  174. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  175. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  176. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  177. Randi Middleton
    May 31, 2012

    Just remember… Guns just point the zombies in your direction and the next thing you know you have a whole herd on you. Plus, catching them on fire just makes fire zombies.

  178. Max Asante you really think so?

  179. Max Asante you really think so?

  180. Max Asante you really think so?

  181. Max Asante you really think so?

  182. Max Asante you really think so?

  183. Max Asante you really think so?

  184. Max Asante you really think so?

  185. yeah , but he didn't go around eating people

  186. thank heavens I live in Florida

  187. I think it was the other way around…he told a bunch of dudes to eat his body and drink his blood…kinda like reverse zombies

  188. @Katherine Pitts: A zombie (Haitian Creole: zonbi; North Mbundu: nzumbe) is an animated corpse brought back to life by mystical means, such as witchcraft.[1] The term is often figuratively applied to describe a hypnotized person bereft of consciousness and self-awareness, yet ambulant and able to respond to surrounding stimuli. Since the late 19th century, zombies have acquired notable popularity, especially in North American and European folklore.
    Says nothing about eating people. There is some validity to the fact that Jesus was a zombie. Just sayin…

  189. The whole natural predators thing is sooo stupid. Every movie and show Ive seen has dogs, and other animals turning Zombie and killing people. That fact doesnt need to be there for sure :P

  190. ahahaha There are Zombies, its called " the government" an they feed off of every american in the US just so they stay rich and on top while most of the middle class an low class stay on bottom while the ones who have it easy stay on top, but in any case, if anything. if Zombies do come to life, well then its all out World War Z =P hppy Zday all =^.^=.

  191. Brian Malkiewicz "zombie outbreaks usually occour"? since when has there ever been an outbreak? remember that time when that dog got rabies… then bit that other dog, and the next morning EVERY single dog in the world had rabies? no? well thats because it didnt happen. not saying im not totally gunning for an excuse to use all the guns and ammo ive been prepping for years but i think if it was to happen, it would be more along the lines of 28 days/weeks later. not walking dead….

  192. Are you a zombie?

  193. Okay, Zombies may not exist, but what about Crazy, 'cannibals' hyped on on drags and adrenaline? We've already got that happening in my freakin' state! Faces gettin' bitten off… you apparently don't have to be dead to act like a Zombie and eat people…

  194. Flies would take care of the problem in relatively short order.

  195. Ethelwaldo Arocho
    May 31, 2012

    Zombies are on all sides, I have becomse an observer. Some are more dangerous than others.

  196. Brilliant answer!

  197. I can't say I'm ready but my kids and I watch WALKING DEAD and play plenty of BLACK OPs…never know what 2morrow will be like…

  198. Patrick Heartlock
    May 31, 2012

    Zombies aren't real to mature people……….toddlers do!

  199. there might be im just saying..I feel like the man eating another mans face incident was a cover up or something, but if there was ever gonna be a zombie apocalypse i would be ready

  200. you must be one yourself

  201. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  202. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  203. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  204. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  205. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  206. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  207. Todd Lucas
    May 31, 2012

    We already have zombie hordes walking among us on a daily basis. They are called "21st Century Teenagers".

  208. Actually jesus would probably be a vampire since vampires are undead instead of living dead which are zombies. Living dead is animation of a corpse undead is someone being dying and then not being dead after wards…but is still dead

  209. I guess everyone should pick out a celebrity they wish to hook up with and prepare to go rescue them when z-day occurs.

  210. move to higher ground. pick their asses off one at a time with head shots. Only a dummy wouldn't be stocking up on ammo at this point and have multiple weapon at his/her disposal. I have the perfect place to set up camp. They could all come, and they would all get wasted.

  211. Humberto Bedoya
    May 31, 2012

    meanwhile in africa…..

  212. you are a jackass, like everyone else who plays that crap. It is much different in the field and in real life! you want to be prepared? Get a gun and start practicing.

  213. If computers are the gateway to success these days, where they ever given any choice in the matter? No. We put unimaginable power in the hands of children on a daily basis. We're going to have to deal with what happens because of that.

  214. In any movie situation, that line would immediately be followed with one of you getting eaten in front of the other. Practically a law that they write it like that.

  215. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  216. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  217. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  218. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  219. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  220. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca … Um technically zombies are not dead but are the "Living" dead.

    Guessing your new to zombie 101 but the virus would eventually keep things moving and flowing in order to prevent further cause off decaying… shoot a zombie in the head and its done for the inhabited body. The virus controls motor functions which invades the brain and nervous system. Extreme cold environments can be a problem because Frostbite or frozen flesh can happen rapidly – within minutes – at any temperature below 0 degrees C (32 degrees F). Extreme heat is not a problem unless sever drying out of the body occurs due to server wounds.

  221. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    They do not produce excrement in order for that to happen you need functioning organs. Their stomach either ruptures or they vomit what they ingest. But the hunger never slows down.

  222. Greg Russell
    May 31, 2012

    Funny how trendy zombies are now, I've been into Romero flicks since the 80's, now everyone is an "expert".

  223. Matt Basden
    May 31, 2012

    movies and games.

  224. Matt Basden
    May 31, 2012

    Eric Arnold flies would spread the virus. Nice try.

  225. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    I luv the fact how some of you debunk the senerio without any research…

    Ever heard of these words before?

    Toxoplasmosa

    Neurotoxins

    Rage Virus (Terrorists involved).

    Neurogenesis

    Nanobots

    Thing is there are some people out there all hell bent on seeing the world turn into complete chaos, all it takes is proper execution.

  226. I guess people talk about Zombie Apocalypse because they want it to happen in a way.If I were to choose how this world should end I would choose zombie invasion scenario.I wouldn't want to be as a zombie but I would want to run from them and destroy them.I would also like to find a group of other normal people, so we could help each other and fight for survival together.Teamwork, adrenaline and adventures is what makes zombie apocalypses so interesting.I recommend you to watch The Walking Dead and you'll know what I'm talking about.Of course I'm being realistic and scientifically speaking it's unlikely to happen but there's no harm in fantasizing about it.

  227. I think Ethelwaldo Arocho has first symptoms of zombiness:)

  228. I think Ethelwaldo Arocho has first symptoms of zombiness:)

  229. I'll just walk you to the nearest electronics supermarket and you can grab whatever you want.Deal?

  230. I'll just walk you to the nearest electronics supermarket and you can grab whatever you want.Deal?

  231. If being serious then you're perfectly right.

  232. Those "zombies" don't try to have you as their meal

  233. All of you who beleive Jesus was a zombie are idiotic fools.

  234. …they can read minds???????

  235. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Well, I'm ready. Got the shotgun, the.45, and the.223 ready to go. Lots of ammo too. Bring it on!

  236. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    Zombie is just another way of saying wage slave.

  237. Scott Acacia Painter
    May 31, 2012

    lololol

  238. Scott Acacia Painter
    May 31, 2012

    You both act as if this has happened and you KNOW. This is ridiculous you understand that right?

  239. what if we were all zombies once, but there was a human apocalypse?

  240. me too

  241. Living close to the face-eater zombie, we'll get the first wave of them! We'll try to hold out, and prevent them from leaving Florida. Everyone else evacuate to the north! Be sure to stock up on blunt weaponry, swords and axes, and fire arms!

  242. Come down to Texas, you can stock and reload here.

  243. Are u sure u can hold them? The people up in Michigan, Maine and Washington states must be really happy.

  244. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    u are the biggest idiot of all times…

  245. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    May 31, 2012

    Time to call on Jesus the zombie slayer ;) .

  246. Chinny Ace Kim
    May 31, 2012

    These comments are so interesting to read.

  247. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    How stupid are people these days? Next will be the bogey man. If you beleive this, I have some property in the middle of Lake Ontario I would like to sell you.

  248. Yeshua Jesus Christ was not a zombie, A zombie (which is fictional!) is a demonic entity that enters into the dead corpse of once living human, Yeshua Jesus Christ was raised up INCORRUPTIBLE as the embodiment of light and purity and love! You cannot and WILL NOT mock the Lord thy GOD without being held accountable! I would not want to be any of you when The Lord comes again to destroy the wicked! I pray you all REPENT NOW for your Blasphemy! You have been warned!

  249. Kenneth LeVar Allen
    May 31, 2012

    I can still hope can't I?

  250. Anonymous
    May 31, 2012

    HOW TO MAKE BIG BUCKS WITH GOOGLE. VISIT THIS SITE FOR MORE INFO – surl.hu/financialfreedom

  251. I should start doing more cardio….

  252. Some dude didn't eat another dudes face a year ago.

  253. Some dude didn't eat another dudes face a year ago.

  254. Some dude didn't eat another dudes face a year ago.

  255. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  256. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  257. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  258. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  259. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  260. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  261. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  262. Anthony Giryt LaMarca I need a dislike button for you.

  263. not to mention the BEGINNING OF IT ALL. I fucking warned all of you : https://twitter.com/GonzoChicagogo/status/195650141858955266.

  264. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  265. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  266. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  267. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  268. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  269. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  270. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  271. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  272. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  273. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  274. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  275. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  276. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  277. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  278. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  279. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  280. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  281. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  282. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  283. SO WRONG. I LOVE HOW YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU CAN JOKE ABOUT ALL THIS.
    JUST WAIT

  284. EVEN THE JOURNALIST THINKS THIS IS A JOKE.
    REALLLY? you really think you can get views off a heavy topic by making a joke out of it?
    guesss what, when SOME dumbfounded research goes bad and it spreads like wildfire if the earth was made out of gasoline, that's when you won't be joking about it anymore. But whatever, I won't care because you'll be a WALKER and I would've already seen it all coming. :p Happy Hunting mates.

  285. Jesus was a cosmic Jewish zombie sent to us from a magical sky wizard who likes to burn us all like some stupid kid burning ants with a magnifying glass….there,Iv'e just joked about it and I haven't been struck by lightning…your move

  286. Kenneth LeVar Allen
    May 31, 2012

    Anthony Giryt LaMarca Crack heads roam Baltimore and they look like zombies to me.

  287. Lewis Hull
    May 31, 2012

    My neighbor keeps walking around in his driveway aimlessly. He's crossing my yard now, I wonder what he wa….OH GOD MY ARM! AHHHHHh…………. #ZombieApocalypse

  288. Daryl Bargiband
    May 31, 2012

    Yes, but flesh-eating is a sign of the end. It's in the Bible, Isaiah chapter 9.

  289. Well, at least I would hope that they are the slow and clumsy kind of zombies a la Romero's "Night of the Living Dead". I've smoked far too many cigarettes and eaten one too many Hot Pocket to evade these new-fangled, physically superior, tri-athletic zombies they have nowadays…

  290. dummy hes gods son andgod is no zombie

  291. dummy hes gods son andgod is no zombie

  292. Zombies have changed over the years. They can be the walking dead or they can get it from a virus, it has more than just ONE meaning.

  293. Too bad God doesn't exist.

  294. Anonymous
    Jun 1, 2012

    Hmmmm, if "apocalypse" is defined at the end of life as we know it, and "zombie" means a being who's alive but without a brain… then I think a prolonged period of stagnation for Western Civilization (a redundancy), combined with – as a first – all of the "solutions" being offered being simply the same bad ideas which caused the stagnation to begin with, then I think we actually are in a "zombie apocalypse." Art does imitate life, after all.

  295. Monk Key
    Jun 1, 2012

    Err aarrrgg raarrr reee uhhhgggaa

  296. biting is not a terrible way to spread disease(it means psychical contact like zombie blood getting your mouth,wounds) no animal would eat the zombie first BEcuz there is NO NATURAL predator becuz zombie isn't in the ecosystem yet and what ever animal eats it would turn into a zombie and we would have to worry about zombie bears which will not make the outbreak a fail and may i remind its disease so it not be easy to get rid off zombie just by waiting for them to rot and what about the people in those grave they have stuff in their blood stream to keep them from rotting

  297. jesus is a zombie

  298. jesus is a zombie

  299. jesus is a zombie

  300. jesus is a zombie

  301. Will Currier
    Jun 1, 2012

    Keith Sowulewski Better start getting bottle caps!

  302. Jimmy Gelert
    Jun 1, 2012

    Nicely written brah.

  303. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 1, 2012

    Nope he choose to do did his father's will who's will are you doing God or the Devil ?;)

  304. God does not stand mocked. Whatsoever a man sows, he reaps. And by Randall's and Shit's comments, you have two people who are looking for first class tickets to hell.

  305. Jesus was a cosmic Jewish zombie sent to Earth to die by his magical sky wizard father who lives on a cloud in some magical realm inhabited by freaky bird people….there,I have just mocked God,Jesus and your religion as a whole and I have yet to be struck by lightning~

  306. Anonymous
    Jun 1, 2012

    I guess this means YOU will be one of the first eaten….

  307. Jon Madsen
    Jun 1, 2012

    just post the whole cracked article!

  308. science

  309. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 2, 2012

    Science is just a tool to discover how things in nature work and cannot disprove God existence so again you must choose who you will serve.

  310. well what can prove god existence

  311. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 2, 2012

    Check this link!
    http://youtu.be/AJioWKPlBIw

  312. i could already prove etenal force you discover is wrong

  313. and btw the energy comes from atoms you know E=mc(squared) this prove the big bang theroy if its a small ball with an large large amounts density erupt create matter and energy

  314. you might as well said god is electron and my answer would still be science and if there a god then where the devil?

  315. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 2, 2012

    The devil is man's enemy you cannot see it since he is a spirit but you can see his handy work with God's permission all around you i.e. war,famine,diseases,inciting you to break God's commandments which is sin.

    check my you tube site :http://youtu.be/ysNd4QGOgeY

  316. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 2, 2012

    The devil is man's enemy you cannot see it since he is a spirit but you can see his handy work with God's permission all around you i.e. war,famine,diseases,inciting you to break God's commandments which is sin.

    check my you tube site :http://youtu.be/ysNd4QGOgeY

  317. didn't they technally said god is dead since all the electron dosen't work like an indviual anymore like they use to in the big bang

  318. Jorge Zendy Martinez
    Jun 2, 2012

    No….God made the Big Bang so he was not part of it…..Without God the Big bang which he created out of nothing could not be created in the first place….

  319. no it was created out of matter, a small ball with more density than all the matter in a universe

  320. Kevin Fentress
    Jun 3, 2012

    He's not an idiot, he's just making a joke. You're an idiot for believing in that stupid crap.

  321. Kevin Fentress
    Jun 3, 2012

    See "I'm gonna get a bunch of weapons and got a on a killing spree" that's what everyone says. But you don't know how the zombie disease is passed on. It could be an air borne virus, and you get exposed immediately. It could be in our water or food. It could be just the people dying cause there's no room in hell.Could be a brain fungus… You're not preparing for all the possible scenarios by just planning to kill zombies.

  322. Kevin Fentress
    Jun 3, 2012

    Ok this is probably one of the stupidest things I've ever read. -6 IQ points. Not to mention that your conservative, capitalistic, christian, right-wing/patriotic group of people have caused more death and wars than anything combined. And that 99% of those protests you are talking about are completely non-violent (besides the violence by t he police, which are working for your side anyways). Fail.

  323. Gloria Cross
    Jun 3, 2012

    you don't believe in ZOMBIES? someone is truely in trouble– LOL

  324. Sidney Cats Wilson
    Jun 4, 2012

    This just made my day I hope I come back as a zombie ill eat all of your guys brains just for the hell of it we will all be zombie friends LOL!

  325. Jesus isn't a zombie, he's a faggot.

  326. Ethelwaldo Arocho
    Jun 7, 2012

    People die for stupid reasons on all sides, what more stupid of dying of an overdose, or drunk driving? More people die of such things than in all wars combined. At least those people died for their ideals whatever I or you agree with them, a loss is those who die in the futility of living following the vane of living for themselves.

  327. its harder than it is in the movies, we can catch the virus without even being bit in reality

  328. good point

  329. yall watch too many scary movies yes their has been some outbreaks of caniablism but not all big like you see in the movies.

  330. DOWNLOAD FULL VERSION PC GAMES ACTION GAMES HERE –>>> http://www.argames786.blogspot.com

  331. SEE TOP WAYS OF EARNING MONEY ONLINE HERE –>>> http://www.earningpassion.blogspot.com

  332. MOST DOWNLOADED PC GAMES SEE HERE–>>> http://www.argames786.blogspot.com