Open Letter ‘Apology’ To Bill Cosby Victims Means Well, But Sends The Wrong Message

The alleged Bill Cosby victims are getting something of a public apology, but not from the man who admitted to giving Quaaludes for sex in a recently unsealed deposition.

No, instead they’re getting that apology via an open letter from writer Nneka Samuel of Madame Noire. But while her letter is nicely written, it sends the wrong message that we should be sending as a society.

Allow me to explain.

The push of Samuel’s letter is that she is sorry that the Bill Cosby victims have had to have their cases drag out in the public eye with many people unwilling to believe them or not being quick to buy into their stories or, as she puts it specifically, that “his rights were more protected than your own” within the justice system.

I’ll admit the deposition doesn’t paint Bill Cosby in a good light. It pretty much destroys whatever perceptions of character remained from the man, who once taught us all how to live through his family sitcom and his considerable influence.

Even if the women knew they were being drugged for the purposes of sex and were fine with it, it doesn’t make up for the fact that Cosby has painted himself as a wholesome family man for decades, all the while betraying his wife and his family through his numerous affairs.

But should I let anyone apologize for me because I was willing to give an accused criminal the same due process that I was giving his victims? My whole take on the situation from the beginning till now has been this.

The first of the Bill Cosby victims comes forward — “I hope it’s not true but let’s wait and see what else comes out before publicly convicting the man.”

Three victims come forward — “Not good but authorities still have more information than I do, they’re in a better position to handle the case.”

Ten victims come forward — “Where there’s smoke there’s fire.”

Twenty victims come forward — “The man’s guilty as sin.”

You get the point.

As more facts of the case became available to me, my perception of the case took shape. The details have taken me from skepticism to surety, at least to the point that I believe Bill Cosby is a bad man.

There is still much evidence and testimony to sort through before we can say he was guilty of raping all of the Bill Cosby victims, or some of them, or — not as likely — none of them. But we still don’t have all the facts.

Apologizing for not drawing a conclusion based on accusations or shreds of evidence here and there is not only reactionary, it’s immoral.

This time, it could very well be that Bill Cosby manipulated and abused his victims, then used his considerable influence to protect himself from prosecution and consequences.

I firmly believe that to be the case based on what I now know. But I won’t apologize or allow anyone to apologize for me because I refused to throw in with the court of public opinion just because they were right this one time.

When you don’t have enough evidence to draw a reasonable conclusion, you don’t need to draw a conclusion anyway based simply on hearsay and sketchy media reports.

That’s what many media outlets and individuals did with this story. Sometimes they get it right, as is probably the case with the Bill Cosby victims. But sometimes they get it wrong, and when they do, it can be catastrophic to a person or business’s reputation, or even its livelihood.

For instance, how many people stood up and said they would boycott Kentucky Fried Chicken for telling a small child attacked by a pit bull she’s too ugly to eat in their restaurant? At the time, there were thousands upon thousands. Turned out, the whole thing was a hoax.

Or what about Rolling Stone’s “A Rape on Campus,” which vilified pretty much the entire University of Virginia based on a story with no basis in fact? That got Twitter in an uproar until Rolling Stone had to print a retraction days later.

(Yet still some believe.)

It’s important, especially when cases like those of the Bill Cosby victims first break, to sit on your thoughts until you’ve actually read more than a few news stories and a dozen online comments.

Stay off Twitter, keep your mouth shut about what you don’t know, and let the facts come out. Pitching in with the Nneka Samuels of the world may work out in your favor sometimes — or even most times — but when you get it wrong — and you will get it wrong — you are directly responsible for the dumbing down of our society and the lack of integrity much of our media now possesses.

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