Haley Smith: Rare Syndrome Made Teen Believe She Was One Of The Walking Dead

A rare syndrome caused Alabama teen Haley Smith to believe she was literally one of the walking dead for three years of her life.

It all began for Haley after her parents divorced. She was sitting in class and suddenly developed what she described as a “really weird sensation” that she was actually dead, and she just couldn’t shake it. She went to visit the school nurse who, baffled by the girl’s description, could find nothing wrong and sent her along.

On her way home from school, Haley said the following.

“As I walked home I thought about visiting a graveyard, just to be close to others who were also dead. But because there wasn’t one nearby I went straight back to my house and tried to sleep it off.”

Her idea to “sleep it off” appeared to initially work, but just a few days later, the idea that she was actually dead struck her again while she was shopping.

“My whole body went numb and I dropped all the dresses I was holding and ran out of the shop. I felt like I was going mad.”

And this time, she was unable to make the feeling that she was dead go away. Haley began missing school, sleeping through the day and staying awake all night. She was also distracted by strange compulsions and desires.

“I’d fantasize about having picnics in graveyards and I’d spend a lot of time watching horror films because seeing the zombies made me feel relaxed, like I was with family.”

As time went by, and the feeling persisted, Haley chose to embrace what she saw as her “new” life — even if her new life meant she believed she was actually dead.

“I decided to eat whatever I wanted because I couldn’t put on weight if I was dead.”

Haley’s bizarre belief that she was actually dead caused her to withdraw from her friends but, eventually, in despair, she reached out to one of her closest friends about what she was going through. She said, “I thought he’d think I was a freak but he just nodded and listened.” Talking to her friend gave her the confidence to confide in her father, who urged her to see a psychiatrist. Still, it was two years until Haley found the courage to see a doctor, who immediately diagnosed her with Cotard’s Syndrome.

Cotard’s Syndrome, also known as “Walking Corpse Syndrome,” is an ultra-rare disorder that causes sufferers to genuinely believe they are dead, or that parts of their bodies no longer exist. Some even die of starvation because they so firmly believe that, since they are dead, they no longer need to eat. Many lose the ability to recognize even familiar faces, causing a further feeling of disconnect from the living. The syndrome was formally identified by French neurologist Jules Cotard in 1880, but there are cases that date back to 1788. It is a form of delusional psychosis, and sufferers’ distorted reality is caused by a malfunction of the fusiform gyrus, the area of the brain that recognizes faces, as well as malfunctioning in the amygdala, which is the set of neurons that process emotions. There is no cure for Cotard’s Syndrome, but common treatments include anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, and electroconvulsive therapy.

“It was so amazing to find out it was a real illness,” Haley admits.

“I went online and found stories of other people who suffered from it. They wanted to spend time in graveyards too. It made me feel so much better that I wasn’t the only one.”

Talking with the therapist set her on the road to recovery, but Haley also credits her recovery, oddly enough, to Disney films.

“Watching Disney films gave me a warm, fuzzy feeling… The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Sleeping Beauty, Bambi – I watched them all. I asked my boyfriend Jeremy: ‘How can I be dead when Disney makes me feel this good?'”

As for what it was like to suffer from Cotard’s Syndrome, Haley Smith’s summary is ironic, to say the least.

“Being a corpse was the most bizarre experience, but I’m so glad I managed to get out alive.”

Haley Smith wanted to tell her story because she knows just how rare the disease is — before her, only one Cotard’s sufferer has spoken publicly, and he did not give his full name. To read his amazing story of survival while believing he was actually dead for a total of nine years, click here.

[Image via the Daily Mail]