Hugh Hefner Seeks Full Custody Of Couple’s Dog

Though Hugh Hefner and ex-fiancé Crystal Harris called off their engagement just days before their wedding in June, there is still one thing holding the two together: a charming Cavalier King Charles spaniel, creatively named “Charlie”.

If you’re on the wrong side of 30, you know Hef as the founder and long-time publisher of the magazine Playboy. If you’re in your late-teens or early-twenties, you know Hef from his show Girls Next Door. Either way, everyone knows the man for his night-life and endless supply of blonde bombshells, of which Harris is only the latest in what will surely be an enduring line, since Hef is apparently immune to consequences.

The “amicable” split has been uncomfortably passive-aggressive, beginning with reports of a mutual break-up followed by comments from Harris criticizing Hef for “two-second” stamina, and then in September, news of Harris’s intention of auctioning off her 3.39 engagement rock (worth more than your college education, and mine).

Hefner, Playboy mogul and libertine, originally said that Harris could keep the dog — according to her, anyway. Hefner says they’re still working it out, but believes that it’s only fair that he receive full custody, saying:

“I told her if she wants to keep the ring and the Bentley, then maybe I can keep the puppy. I [hope] we will work it out.”

In an attempt to garner some sympathy, Hefner continued by saying that Charlie isn’t “$100,000 worth”, hinting at his generous buy-off of Harris.

All bets are off in this classic “mom-and-dad-care-more-about-winning-than-family” custody battle.

Some people really have it rough.

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