Robert D. Bourque, 55, was convicted of driving with a blood-alcohol content well over the legal line, which is a surprise given that his story made so much sense (read: sarcasm). He told his arresting officer that he had merely poured alcohol in his ears to test a theory he had about how Jesus healed the deaf.
And that’s what set off the Breathalyzer, officer.
Yeah, it makes no sense. The judge agreed and convicted Bourque.
He did admit that he drank three beers and ate a pizza at a restaurant before he was stopped, and that he had a beer earlier in the day, but that earned him no leniency. Considering the Breathalyzer to be a pretty decent judge of how much alcohol someone has ingested from analysis of their breath, Justice R.G. Hunter hit Bourque with a $1,000 fine and a one-year driving ban.
Mr. Bourque isn’t the first person to peg his illegal proclivities on the almighty.
An Andover, Maine man was arrested in 2011 for allegedly breaking into a residence. He told police that his dog and Jesus made him do it.
Police said that the man had been squatting in the home while the owner was on vacation. In addition to it being Jesus’ fault, the man relayed to his arresting officer that he was supposed to meet country singer Taylor Swift in the house and marry her in a backyard ceremony.
So the moral of this story? Name-dropping Jesus is unlikely to get you out of a bind if you’re that deeply in.