Uwe Boll Kickstarter: ‘You Have To Pay It, Because Nobody Else Will’

The Uwe Boll Kickstarter is underway. (Sometimes the stories just write themselves.)

Yes, the director responsible for 30 titles including modern classics, such as House of the Dead, BloodRayne, and Alone in the Dark (the crappy Christian Slater/Tara Reid film) has taken to the crowd-funding site to raise $500,000 for a sequel to his incoherent 2007 piece Postal.

“You have to pay it,” Boll tells the Kickstarter community, “because nobody else will.”

And with good reason. Since Boll started making films in 1992, he has churned out one box office failure after another and started a love-hate relationship with the Internet film critic community.

In fact, relations between the former German boxer and his critics have grown so strained that in 2006, they actually turned violent.

Boll hand-picked four physically scrawny film critics, including Ain’t It Cool News rep MiraJeff, and gave them all a sound in-ring drubbing.

(Read about that experience here.)

As far as the Uwe Boll Kickstarter is concerned, who knows? He’s got a shot. Looking at the haul from the last few days, he’s up to $7,231 with 59 days to go.

Of course, we’re not sure how much of that is his own money, but from the looks of things, he has backers. In fact, one has pledged $1,000, which will get two tickets for the Postal 2 premiere in Los Angeles as well as access to the after-show party.

If one wanted to actually have a speaking role in the film, they’d have to give $7,500 and $10,000 for the executive producer credit.

So far, there are 164 idiots backers, most of whom chose the smaller packages.

If you’re not yet convinced to give this modern day Ed Wood (without the charm and hilarity) money, maybe this will convince you:

Or this:

Obviously, Boll is hopeful he can hit his target. Recent successful efforts like this one from Spike Lee and, of course, the Veronica Mars project are reason to keep the dream alive.

Hopefully, you people won’t enable him. In the meantime, it’ll be interesting to see how the Uwe Boll Kickstarter progresses.

[Image via Flickr Creative Commons]