San Francisco Can Now Ban Passengers Who Poop On Subway

Attention, would-be subway-poopers: San Francisco is not putting up with your crap any longer; Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART), San Fran’s express train system, now has the power to ban you from using the service.

Assembly Bill 716, which passed last year and came into action Monday, lets BART issue bans for all those who think using a subway as a public bathroom is acceptable behavior. The new law allows BART to submit a “prohibition order” to any miscreant who commits a crime on BART’s property.

That obviously includes pooping and masturbating as well as more serious crimes such as stabbings, assaults, drug-dealing, and so forth.

Talking very loudly on a phone and sneezing without covering one’s piehole is still not punishable, regrettably.

The new bill lets BART ban individuals for anything from 30 days to one year. However, those who carry out smaller crimes such as vandalism (and yes, pooping) will still not be instantly punished; they’ll have to collect three citations within a period of 90 days before having to walk home, says BART.

BART already has a process of keeping bad people at bay, reports SF Weekly, but it’s reportedly not particularly efficient.

A total of 130 names are currently on the “stay-away” list, but Kenton Rainey, BART police chief, told The San Francisco Chronicle the new law will mean this list will grow substantially.

In other words, commuting in San Francisco could be about to get a lot more bearable, not to mention more fragrant.