During a recent episode of the Motherly podcast, Grey’s Anatomy star Caterina Scorsone – who plays the role of Amelia Shepherd – opened up about how her perception of motherhood shifted after she gave birth to her second daughter Paloma, who she has affectionately nicknamed Pippa.
As the actress’s 1.9 million Instagram followers know, Caterina’s daughter Pippa has Down syndrome.
“When I had Eliza, I think what I unconsciously thought about my job as a mother was that I was supposed to equip her to survive in a competitive world. My job was to make sure that she was educated and that she was able and that she had all of the skills that she needed. I thought that was my job,” Scorsone explained.
According to the 37-year-old mother, everything changed when her daughter was diagnosed with Down syndrome. She realized there would be both cognitive and physical differences between her daughter and other children.
Scorsone explained that after her daughter’s diagnosis she was overwhelmed with confusion as she didn’t know how she was supposed to be a proper mother to Pippa.
“If my job isn’t to equip her to compete or dominate socially, educationally or physically or economically — if I’m not just supposed to be helping her do that, what is a mother, what is my job?” she added as she explained the questions about motherhood that consumed her.
According to the actress, she spent some time panicking about how to handle the situation before the answer to her concerns and questions dawned on her.
“I’m supposed to keep her safe and I’m supposed to make her feel loved.”
According to Caterina, it was in that moment following that realization that her entire view on motherhood changed.
After this new revelation dawned on her, the actress also discovered her method of parenting her older daughter Eliza wasn’t going down the path she wanted it to.
Scorsone explained that every parent tries to control, manipulate, and plan the best possible future for their children. But, what she realized – and what she believes other parents need to realize – is you only have so much control, as your children will ultimately grow up and decide how they want to live their lives on their own.
According to Caterina, she decided she needed to stop trying to “stack the deck” for her children’s futures and focus on providing them with a safe and loving environment in which to grow up.