The Young and the Restless star Kristoff St. John's ex-wife, Mia St. John, revealed the heartbreaking conversation she had with him before his death in February.
According to a report by Extra, Mia has understandably been struggling with Kristoff's passing. She related how some days are better than others and how she's looking forward to when things get better, but added that it's much too soon for that happen.
"I'm so used to having Kristoff as my rock... he was always just there for me," she said of his passing.
Mia reveals that during her final call with Kristoff, she knew something was off. Having talked with him every day and spoken with him regularly about his suicidal thoughts since his son, Julian, died by his own hand five years ago, she knew something had changed in him.
"Even though we talked every day, this call was a very different call. He kept saying he wanted to die, but he said in a different way this time that really struck me. He tells me to hang on one second, that Julian's at the door, and I just started screaming 'No!'"Mia and Kristoff's son Julian died by suicide in 2014 after battling depression for most of his life. Since his passing, Kristoff had also dealt with depression and was never the same. Mia has blamed Kristoff's passing on medical professionals who were treating him for mental health issues days before his death. Supposedly, Kristoff was meant to be on a 14-day hold but was released after four days for unknown reasons. Mia believes that a lack of education and a poorly trained staff are the reasons why he was released too soon.
In light of losing both her son and her husband within the span of a few years, Mia has vowed to become an advocate for mental health and seeks to improve awareness and education on the issue.
Shortly after Kristoff's passing, Mia posted on Twitter that the deaths of her son and ex-husband could have been prevented, but those assisting their recovery were incompetent.
She stated that Julian died while in a mental health facility and Kristoff had been sent home from one even though he was still suicidal. Mia alleged that both facilities have a history of "violations [and] falsifying records" and there's no one holding them accountable for their failures.
Understandably, Mia is struggling with her own mental health issues, as she admitted that after her ex-husband died, she found herself in the hospital on a 14-day hold. She also fell off the wagon on her sobriety after having maintained it for 30 years.
"I'm getting there... I am working on it. All I can do is one day at a time," she said of her road to recovery.
If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741. For readers outside the U.S., visit Suicide.org or Befrienders Worldwide for international resources you can use to find help.