Cards Against Humanity Launches 99 Percent Off Black Friday Sale
Cards Against Humanity, the irreverent card game whose business model relies heavily on snark and pranks, is in the midst of its own Black Friday sale — offering 99 percent off certain products every ten minutes. Those products have included such things as a $20 bill for twenty cents, and a 1.5-carat diamond ring for $32.15.
“Holy f**k have we got some deals. Every ten minutes, a new deal will go live on this page… As the ancient Mayans foretold, a savings event of this magnitude only occurs once every thousand years. Act now while supplies last.”
Over on 99percentoffsale.com, every ten minutes a new deal goes up, and the item in question can be yours for one percent of the asking price. True to form — and in keeping with Cards Against Humanity’s tendency to embrace the ridiculous — the website features glaring, white-on-red scrolling text and ’90s-era graphics. And the deals are absolutely phenomenal, although some of them are things few people are going to actually want.
For example, as these words are being typed, the next deal is ten 50-pound bags of dried garbanzo beans. Ordinarily retailing for $579, one lucky buyer will have purchased them for $5.79.
#Cooking Jack Rabbit Chick Peas / Garbanzo Beans (Pack of 3) 16 oz Bags Best … https://t.co/Aujwj7PNxU pic.twitter.com/XNVaavyrGN
— Tasty Gift (@stupeles88) August 16, 2016
Other deals are equally weird. At 10:00 a.m. Eastern Time, an unknown quantity of $20 bills were sold for twenty cents each (“an unbelievable $19.80 in savings!”). At 11:00 a.m. an authentic, 17th-Century Italian polearm worth $1,850 was sold for $18.50. At 11:30 a.m. a “Presidential Mahogany Casket,” quoted as being worth $3,199, went for $31.90. The product statement read, “protect your lifeless body from microbes and insects!”
In case you were wondering, all of these deals are legit — or at least, that’s the claim being made in the attendant FAQ.
“Yes. All of these products are actually available for 99% off, and if you purchase something we will actually ship it to you.”
It remains unclear, as of this writing, if the buyers have to pay the shipping. This might make caskets — or 500-pound orders of garbanzo beans — considerably less attractive.
This is the latest in Cards Against Humanity‘s ongoing annual tradition of holding a Black Friday prank. If you’ve ever played the game, you know that sarcasm, gallows humor, and almost-appalling inappropriateness rules the day. And the makers have extended that sentiment to their Black Friday pranks.
For example, in 2017, as Market Watch reported at the time, the company announced that it was getting out of the games industry. They were allegedly keen on creating a new brand of potato chips, “Prongles.” And in 2016, according to Twisted Sifter, they purchased land and started digging a hole — nothing more, nothing less — with the promise to keep digging as long as the money kept coming in.
So head on over to the website linked a few paragraphs above and see what Black Friday “deals” you can get — such as a bust of former president Barack Obama for $5.50 — before the day is out.
