Good News: Tiger Wasn’t Drunk. Bad News: His Wife Beat The Shit Out of Him

The Tiger Woods hookup with a happy hooker fan soap opera continues to roll on with new suggestions that the injuries he allegedly received in his not so serious car accident were inflicted by his wife.

Original reports claimed that Tiger had received lacerations to his face due to the car accident, and that apparently his wife had to used a golf club to free him from the wreck. Now it’s claimed that the order is wrong: that Tiger’s wife both scratched Woods face and attacked the car with a golf club as he tried to leave, with the accident then following as Woods panicked as his wife got closer in for that Tiger in the head hole in one.

In related news, the hooker woman Tiger is suppose to have been scoring two unders in has been exposed as a celebrity groupie who has a thing for married men. Rachel Uchitel has previously been linked to some married actor that no one can remember who use to be in Buffy, and several other married D List celebrities. Tiger would be her biggest score to date.