Shannon Beador Recalls Not Wanting To Film 'RHOC' Season 12 After 40-Pound Weight Gain

Real Housewives of Orange County star Shannon Beador proudly showed off her 15-pound weight loss at the Season 12 reunion. Looking back, the reality star revealed that she almost didn't want to come back on the show, just thinking of the fat-shaming comments she would receive from viewers.

As seen in the sneak peek reunion episode, via People, Shannon Beador shared that gaining almost 40 lbs. made her feel insecure. She reportedly weighed 172 lbs. at the start of Season 12.

"I have to tell you when the season started filming, I didn't want to film. I didn't want to be in front of the camera. It was like, 'Oh my God, everyone's going to see how I've let myself go,'" Shannon told Andy Cohen.

Although some RHOC fans felt that she was being too hard on herself, Shannon insisted that she has always been a size 2 or 4 so gaining these extra pounds really hit her hard.

"You feel crappy about yourself. And I know there's a lot of women who say, 'You're not that big' or you know 'I'm bigger and you're making too big of a deal out of it.' And I apologize to those women, I didn't meant to offend anyone. But for me, I've always been a size 2 or 4. So for me personally, this was just a huge change," she explained.

In the past episodes of Real Housewives of Orange County, Shannon also admitted that her husband David was "disgusted" by the weight gain. Shannon and David's marriage has been one big roller coaster ride since he cheated on her back in Season 10. The next year, fans thought that everything's going well for the couple after David surprised her with a vow renewal at the Inn at Rancho Santa Fe, where they originally exchanged vows in 2000.

But as we move on to Season 12, we see David getting obsessed with staying in shape, to the point of choosing to hit the gym rather than spend time with his family and kids. According to Shannon, they only speak to each other briefly at dinner before he heads to the gym for his second workout of the day.

Shannon admitted that watching their relationship play on TV has been "very very painful" for her to watch, adding that she can't help but feel pathetic seeing the way she acted.

"Because as I look back and watch it, I was taking the pain that I was trying to mask. It's almost as I look back, I was trying to convince myself that everything was okay and I took that out on other people," she explained.

Catch Part 1 of The Real Housewives of Orange County Season 12 reunion on November 20 at 9 p.m. on Bravo.

[Featured Image by Rich Polk/Getty Images]