Hilariously Genius Election Day Deals And Events To Ease Your Angst

November 8, 2016, will probably be one of the tensest, most anxiety-inducing days of this year – and possibly one of the worst election days we’ve had yet. With that being said, you’re still a citizen who fulfilled a civic duty today, so you deserve a beer (or three). Bonus, you might be in the running for some free swag.

Bananas Smoothies & Frozen Yogurt, multiple locations

Banana’s launched a special “Orange You Glad It’s Over?” smoothie – a 16-ounce blend of nonfat vanilla frozen yogurt, ice, mandarin oranges, and carrots – for the big day. The smoothie will be available for purchase on Wednesday, November 9 for just 45 cents.

“We believe that it’s safe to say it’s a relief that this long election process is finally over,” Andrea Carella, Brand Manager of Bananas Smoothies & Frozen Yogurt and Villa Restaurant Group, said in a press release.

“Bananas Smoothies & Frozen Yogurt created the ‘Orange You Glad It’s Over?’ Smoothie as our way of showing our appreciation to all those that voted and patiently awaited the outcome of this election and participated in the democratic process. We hope that our guests will help us in toasting our 45th President of the United States on November 9th with the ‘Orange You Glad It’s Over?’ – regardless of which candidate gets the job!”

Village Pourhouse, New York City

From 8 p.m. to 11 p.m., the Village Pourhouse will be serving up specialty libations such as the “Donald Drumpf” and the “Secret Server” for $8. In addition to scoring some super cheap booze, the Village Pourhouse is also giving customers the chance to take out their Election Day aggression by hitting one of their Trump or Clinton pinatas for a chance to win a variety of prizes, including a tanning salon gift certificate in Donald’s honor. Guests will also have the chance to take a scary selfie with one of the Trump or Clinton masks they’re giving away.

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All About Burger, multiple locations

All About Burger is offering customers a free burger for voting. Just bring in your “I Voted” sticker to snag your sandwich.

The Duck Inn, Chicago

The Duck Inn is also featuring a Donald Trump pinata filled with Mexican candy and “Hillary’s emails,” a pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey-style game called “Pin the Wig on the Trump,” and drink specials, including $4 Cabrito tequila cocktails and $6 “Life After Bern” Fresno chili poppers.

Krispy Kreme, multiple locations

Flash your “I Voted” sticker and receive a free doughnut.

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Campeon, New York City

The Campeon, located in Union Square, will host a Red, White, & Blue Election Night Party by giving away free “We’re Screwed” T-shirts to the first 200 people to purchase a drink. They’ll also be offering drink specials, including $3 bottles of Budweiser, $3 cans of PBR, and free American flags from 9 p.m. to 11 p.m.

Firehouse Subs, multiple locations

Firehouse is offering up a free medium drink to any guest wearing their “I Voted” sticker on November 8.

Dirty Goose, Washington D.C.

The Dirty Goose is pouring $25 bottomless rail drinks, fried pickles, and crispy fries from 7 p.m. to midnight.

World of Beer, multiple locations

Get your first beer for $1 on November 8.

E’s Bar, New York City

E’s Bar has created a range of unique cocktails for this special day, including “The Hillary” (made with gin, lemon, violet liquor, and club soda) and “The Trump” (made with gin, lemon, cranberry, and club soda). For just $9, patrons can come and watch the election results live from 5 p.m. to close.

Great American Cookies, multiple locations

Get one free cookie at Great American Cookies on November 8.

Belly Up Smokehouse & Saloon, Chicago

Each time Trump wins a state, shots of Fireball whiskey will be just $5. The bar is also offering $12 dirty martinis with blue cheese-stuffed olives in recognition of Clinton.

Texas Jack’s Barbecue, Washington D.C.

Texas Jack’s is hosting a “Tears and Beers” party from 4 p.m. to close. Select wine and beer will be discounted to $5, as well as small bites like brisket and pulled pork sandwiches, wings, and loaded nachos.

Bread & Wine, Chicago

Watch the election results while sipping on any of Bread & Wine’s four election-themed cocktails: the Madame President (Kentucky bourbon, vermouth, sherry and orange), The Apprentice (dry gin, campari, orange juice, bitters, and simple syrup), Bad Hombre (mezcal, cherry liqueur, grapefruit juice, bitters and lemon), and The Smoking Gun (vodka, cranberry, lemon, rosemary simple syrup, burnt rosemary). Each cocktail is $10.

[Feature Image by danielfela/ThinkStock]