Mirror reports that the German government has launched an expensive and bizarrely explicit web campaign with the focus of getting more Germans laid by foreigners. Whether they are in Germany for tourism or on a more permanent basis, the government wants foreigners to know all about how to engage a German in consensual sex.
To head up the sex advocacy campaign, the government set up an instructional website called Zanzu. That seems like a normal thing to do, right? Set up a website teaching Germans and tourism buffs interested in visiting the country about how to do sex properly. Stuff about ensuring safe sex, how to determine whether the sex really is consensual in a given situation, that sort of thing. And if that was as far as the site went, it would not be anything out of the ordinary. The site’s sex-related instructional content does not stop there, though. Far from it.
After heading over to the site’s “sex” front page, a user is faced with a gallery of stick figures engaging in a variety of sex acts, some of them involving one person and some two. Text written in German accompanies each of the images. If the user translates the site to English using the navigation bar at the top of the screen, they will see that the explicit icons on the front page are labeled “What is sex,” “Kinds of sex,” “Masturbation,” “Good sex,” “Casual sex contact,” and “Prostitution/sex work.”
Although tourism obviously does not preclude knowledge of where babies come from, one can see why the inclusion of sections like “what is sex?” and “Prostitution/sex work” might be useful. After all, those who did not grow up in Germany might be unfamiliar with its culture surrounding sex and foreplay. This is especially true of tourists visiting from Asia or other areas where the view on sexual etiquette is much more conservative than in Germany. It is still unusually forward of the government to try and get involved in the sex lives of its citizens and any visitors who may or may not be in Germany for purposes of sex tourism, but it does make some sense.
Maybe the most puzzling aspect of the site is the fact that it includes instructions on proper male masturbation techniques and other semi-sexual acts that just don’t mix with government intervention. The “masturbation” page contains far too many x-rated diagrams to link to here, but it also contains a very thorough and user-friendly how-to section for those who never learned. It’s a quintessential aspect of the tourism industry, people.
The “masturbation” section might seem superfluous, but it is not the furthest the site goes. The “What is sexual pleasure?” page actually describes why people might want to have sex with someone else. You know, for all those asexuals out there who are craving to know more about the mystery of sexual attraction.
Not only is the information the page presents annoyingly redundant, but it also gets cloyingly graphic.
“Talk with your partner about what you both like and how you like it (soft or hard, quick or slow, with your fingers, lips or tongue…).”
Well, that elevated from a vague discussion about the birds and the bees to a penthouse letter in record time. Not that either of those things are really appropriate for a tourism information site, even if it is directed towards the same content matter as a middle school sex ed class.
Perhaps the strangest thing about the site, though, is that scattered among the sex instructions and tutorials are a lot of requests from the government to come to Germany and engage in intercourse with locals.
Germany spent $136,000 on a sex-education website specifically targeted to foreigners. The message is clear: German… pic.twitter.com/WAOtiS7GPe— Nick de Klerk (@nfdeklerk) May 17, 2016
Zanzu may have gone a bit overboard on its brand of sex education, but it is admirable that the German government is addressing the issue at all. Teaching about sex and how to practice it should ideally be done in schools rather than by the tourism bureau, but Germany realizes this is not the case in all countries. They don’t want people visiting their country to have the wrong ideas about sex, and so they are offering a service to those who did not learn about it as kids. For that, they should be commended.
[Featured image by Jessicaphoto/iStock]