Dear Bernie Sanders,
Oh Bernie.
Bernie, Bernie, Bernie.
Okay. Can I just start off by saying how much I still love you? Thank you so much for all you've done for us. You took us so far, you dear, sweet man. Your dauntless will toward the greater good has brought me to tears more times than I can count. You are so sincere, so remarkably goodhearted and genuine in all your efforts, even when you're dead wrong. Which takes me to the next thing I wanted to talk to you about.
The young people aren't buying it, Bernie. The Millennial Generation which carried you so far, the generation which is exponentially better-networked, more informed and more plugged into the zeitgeist of the collective consciousness than any other generation in the history of our species, doesn't seem to agree that Hillary Clinton is the best person to facilitate their desire for swift and radical change in this country.