How Calvin Harris Milks The Swiddleton Love Team Like A Cow

Calvin Harris is perhaps the best “farmer” in the world. Normally, in a real farm scenario, it’s the farmer’s wife who milks the family cow, but having no wife yet, Harris seems to have taken it upon himself to perform the morning ritual. However, the cow, in this case, turns out to be a goose that lays the gold eggs.

The best proof of this is what Billboard reports as the brisk sales that Harris’ latest single, “This Is What You Came For (TIWYCF),” is enjoying. The dance artist admits that his latest work is the product of a Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris collaboration. Don’t get it wrong, it wasn’t Harris who hid the collaboration from under Ryan Seacrest’s table in a radio interview. Her ex-girlfriend, Taylor Swift did actually decide to go on a pseudonym for this project.

Later on, however, Swift breaks away from her “shroud” by claiming that she actually composed the lyrics and the melody of the now established money-maker TIWYCF. And again, to set the record straight, Taylor did not do the Houdini because she was jealous of her ex-boyfriend’s success. Actually, Taylor’s representative says that trigger was Tay Tay’s bleeding heart at the Calvin Harris statement that he hates indulging in any music collaboration with a girlfriend.

Enter musician and actress Rita Ora, who according to a recent article from The Inquisitr, broke up with Calvin Harris on the latter’s pre-Swift days, because of, you guessed it, a music collaboration that has gone bad.

All the preceding discussion shows a Calvin Harris who has a vested interest in holding on to the new love triangle, which in turn, is currently holding the whole world hostage much better than any mass shooting, terrorist act or bombing does. And because it suits The Harris, it is highly unlikely that he will let go of it anytime soon. Like an estranged boyfriend who keeps holding on to a dead relationship, Harris keeps perpetuating what has become of late, Hollywood’s Bermuda Triangle: Taylor Swift, Tom Hiddleston, and Calvin Harris.

If the mysterious Bermuda Triangle is that geographic space where things are said to have disappeared, Calvin’s case of the disappearing tweets and posts is a good example.

Apparently, the Taylor Swift, Tom Hiddleston, and Calvin Harris triangle is many times more potent than the Jelena monicker which is Justin Bieber plus Selena Gomez, a relationship that has been certified dead since 2014 by both camps although it still manages to do a zombie act every now and then.

Calvin Harris has been accusing her ex-girlfriend Taylor Swift of various “crimes,” such as controlling the press, planning her relationships or having a girl squad that behaves like a pack of hyenas. However, the dance artist is more like a con artist who keeps deleting his previous Instagram or Twitter posts whenever it suits him. This is why during the heyday of his attack on Taylor bringing him down as an artist who doesn’t like sharing credit for a job well done, the object of his attack was shown shopping somewhere in Australia’s Gold Coast as if to say that all these media tantrums have money written all over them.


A photo posted by Calvin Harris (@calvinharris) on

Here are a few cases in point.

On May 30, in the midst of widespread speculations regarding their relationship (i.e., Talvin) debacle, Calvin re-released an old photograph of himself wearing sexy Emporio Armani trunks seemingly showing the world that he needs some serious attention, obviously from the single ladies that are out there.

On June 2, he tweeted as follows.

“The only truth here is that a relationship came to an end & what remains is a huge amount of love and respect.”

Calvin Harris has since denied this outcome by constantly throwing muck at his former girlfriend. He would soon litter his social networking history with the following statements.

  • “I write songs, too.”
  • “She’s [Taylor Swift] just doing her thing.”
  • “She [Taylor Swift] controls the media.”

There’s an eerie pattern to these vicious attacks by Calvin Harris.

  1. He composes the tweet
  2. He erases the tweet
  3. His representative comes on board saying that he never made the statement

Each time the Master DJ does this epic dance, the dance artist causes HTTP links from reports around the world to latch onto these posts. So when Harris deletes them, every deletion creates a blank space on the World Wide Web like a watermark or indelible ink.

A perfect example can be found by clicking the link to a People article where Calvin Harris is said to flaunt his abs. Do you see a blank boxed space? This is where the photo of the shirtless Calvin Harris originally appears.

Although the account owner has every right to treat his or her posts in any way desired, this compulsive habit is the smoking gun that unmasks a serial mind changer or a master manipulator. For example, compared to Taylor Swift, the “Teardrops On My Guitar” singer seldom re-edits her posts or cancels them altogether. Perhaps unknown to the DJ, changing or deleting his social network posts always leaves a mark or a trace no matter how he tries to clean up his act like a serial killer wiping up any sign of blood from a crime scene with bleach. Sooner or later, CSI finds out with Luminol.

Maybe Calvin Harris should consider Selena Gomez’ tip to think carefully about what he is posting before hitting the “Post” button. After all, Selena Gomez is the most followed and the most liked person on Instagram, according to Vogue. Calvin Harris can also take a break or a deep breath before he finalizes his social network entry instead of allowing himself to be swept by the moment.

The fact is, every time he does his thing in the same manner that he says “She’s just doing her thing” to refer to Taylor Swift actions like ending a relationship, Calvin Harris is inadvertently increasing his chances of becoming social media’s “The Boy Who Cried Wolf.”

As to his paranoia that his former girlfriend controls the press, Calvin is probably mistaking control with the kind of unshakeable goodwill that Taylor Swift has created through the years because of the sheer consistency of her actions. Since Swift treats both the press and social media like a human being, she, in turn, gets treated like a real human being.

There’s no money involved here, except where it comes to donations for charitable causes of which Taylor Swift is the undisputed celebrity champion for four years going on five, according to Daily Mail. The bottom line is goodwill, one that Swift has been smart or maybe swift enough to cultivate ahead of other celebrities.

Calvin Harris tries to defend himself from all his social media retractions by saying that “I’m only human,” and so that is how social memory is now labeling him exactly: A human being with a unique penchant for changing his mind, retracting his past statements and trying to alter social networking history.

[Rob Grabowski/Invision/AP Images]