Caitlyn Jenner Mourns The Loss Of ‘Bruce,’ Talks Benefits Of ‘Becoming A Woman’

Caitlyn Jenner began making her transition to womanhood nearly a year ago, and now she’s revealing just how difficult the process has been. Apparently, the issues she faced were much bigger than just cosmetic surgery, hormonal changes, hairstyles, and photo shoots. Caitlyn Jenner actually described the transition as a form of “mourning” while embracing a new lifestyle, according to the Daily Mail.

During a recent E! News segment, Caitlyn discussed her sentiments. Although she’s now living life as a woman, the hobbies Bruce loved are still part of her. While she enjoys makeup and fashion, there are still days when she enjoys the more masculine hobbies like flying planes and hitting the racetrack.

“This woman who I am now has lived inside me for all of my life, but Bruce is inside me, too,” Caitlyn said. “I still fly planes and I still go to the racetrack. I still do all that fun stuff and why not? Girls can do it too. I still have my same views, my same relationships with people – all of that is the same.”

RANCHO PALOS VERDES, CA - FEBRUARY 02: CAA Chief Inovation Officer Michelle Kydd Lee and television personality Caitlyn Jenner speak on stage at the 2016 MAKERS Conference Day 2 at the Terrenea Resort on February 2, 2016 in Rancho Palos Verdes, California. (Photo by Jonathan Leibson/Getty Images for AOL)

Caitlyn Jenner also explained the benefits of “becoming a woman” and the positive changes she’s experienced since transitioning. She’s finally becoming comfortable being who she really desires to be.

“One thing that has changed is that I am much more comfortable in going out in public. In the old days, I never went out, even with the family – I dreaded it. These days we are going out. Going to dinner, going to an event, being with my girls [her community of transgender girlfriends]. Life’s become much more fun.”

Caitlyn Jenner delved into the personal details of her life struggle and how she’s battled with gender dysphoria for many years. She began noticing conflicts with her assigned gender at a very early age and opted to keep the problems to herself. Although she tried for years to ignore her discomfort, the issue was never resolved. Even after becoming a successful athlete, marrying, and having children, she found herself facing the same issues behind closed doors. Caitlyn Jenner recounted a number of times where she cross-dressed in secret and how she contemplated transitioning back in the 1980’s, long before her marriage with Kris Jenner.

“I was cross-dressing for years and all the time I was scared to death that I was going to get caught,” she recalled.

“I would walk around the hotel [dressed as a woman] and I kept thinking, ‘Why am I doing this? Is it the excitement of how far can I go and how many chances can I take?'” Caitlyn said.

“I first thought I’d transition in the 1980s. I thought I’d do it when I was 40, but I got to 39 and couldn’t do it, I just couldn’t.”

She also revealed how difficult it had become to hide her transition from the media. For two whole years prior to confirming the transition, Caitlyn Jenner was tormented by the media and paparazzi as speculation continued to mount. But life is much different now, and Caitlyn is quite pleased with the decision she’s made. Despite mourning the loss of Bruce, she’s quite content with the woman she’s become and the accomplishments she’s achieved thus far.

As expected, Caitlyn Jenner has been met with opposition from many directions, but she’s determined not to let anything stop her from embracing life as the woman she’s always wanted to be.

[Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images]