Ted Cruz Casts Himself As Christmas Savior (And Hillary Clinton As Grinch) In New Political Ad

Ted Cruz is debuting a new political ad, and it plays off his earlier public reading of Green Eggs and Ham. Now, he’s reading a list of classic Christmas stories, retold and recast, to center around political issues and figures.

The Republican Presidential hopeful himself takes a starring role, not only in the commercial, where his wife and young daughters seem thoroughly absorbed in tales of political woe, but in one of the reworked stories itself: The Senator Who Saved Christmas. You guessed it. Ted Cruz is the titular Senator, savior of Christmas.

His Democratic rival, Hillary Clinton, is cast in another classic children’s Christmas tale. Cruz reworks How The Grinch Stole Christmas to direct attention back to the long-running accusations against Clinton regarding her private email server.

In Cruz’s new ad, Clinton is cast as the Grinch, naturally. The Grinch Who Lost Her Emails.

The ad doesn’t stop with Hillary. Ted Cruz also takes a few potshots at the Affordable Care Act, or Obamacare, both when he tells his kids that “all of the other reindeer” couldn’t afford Rudolph, and in another refashioned title, How Obamacare Stole Christmas.

Perhaps poor Rudolph’s exorbitant prices explain why he’s also featured as Rudolph The Underemployed Reindeer, perhaps a reference to the decision by some business owners to cut employee hours in order to escape the Affordable Care Act’s requirements regarding employee insurance, or to fears that an increased minimum wage would also lead to reduced employee hours.

The underemployed Rudolph of Cruz’s imagining is depicted warming his hooves over a fire in a barrel, presumably homeless and unable to afford his stable fees on his reduced income.

Then, there’s the reference to claims that the IRS unfairly attacked conservative non-profits. Who would audit Santa Claus? According to Ted Cruz, former IRS director Lois Lerner would, though according to CNN, investigations were completed in October without any charges. Regardless of what Cruz may fear, Lerner isn’t auditing Santa this year, since she’s already resigned her position with the IRS.

Other subjects of Cruz’s political ad are government shutdowns, the Speaker of the House (who melts before Congress), the “Wooden Secretary of State,” and of course, terrorism as depicted in the title, Death To Christmas: The Ayatollah’s Big Red Bomb. Viewers are promised, though, that if they act by voting for him they’ll get a president who serves the country’s needs.

“…a leader who does exactly what he says he’s going to do.”

Ted Cruz’s new ad will air for the first time during tonight’s Saturday Night Live, but he’s already shared it on his YouTube page, so you can see it here, or below.

It’s not quite clear in the ad how Cruz proposes to save Christmas, unless he proposes to save it from the “big red bomb” through bans on immigration by refugees, as The Hill reports that he has promised legislation to enact.

(There is a bill in the House right now to “protect Christmas,” but Cruz isn’t connected to it, and it isn’t expected to even go far as a vote.)

It is, at least, clear that he has a long list of villains from whom he intends to rescue the holiday, though, encompassing the current President, his political opponents, and perhaps much of the American government.

Perhaps the Texas Senator intends to announce his specific plans for saving Christmas in the upcoming week, during his Christmas Tour. Ted Cruz will be visiting eight states who hold their primaries on March 1, 2016, though perhaps campaign stops aren’t exactly the most traditional way to celebrate the season. The tour ends on December 23.

[Images via Ted Cruz YouTube]