Michael Bay is set to bring the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles back to the big screen, only, they won’t be mutant, they’ll be aliens.
“When you see this movie, kids are going to believe one day these turtles actually do exist when we are done with this movie. These turtles are from an alien race, and they are going to be tough, edgy, funny and completely loveable.”
Is Bay serious? Alien turtles are more believable than four sewer turtles who stumble into some toxic ooze, grow to be human size, develop an appetite for pizza, and learn the art of ninja fighting from a giant rat? I don’t think so.
Robbie Rist, who provided the voice for Michelangelo in the first “TMNT” film, said:
“You probably don’t know me but I did some voice work on the first set of movies that you are starting to talk about sodomizing. I know believing in mutated talking turtles is kinda silly to begin with but am I supposed to be led to believe there are ninjas from another planet? The rape of our childhood memories continues.”
Bay released a message to Rist, and the rest of the TNMT fanatics, saying that everyone just needs to relax. Bay said:
“Fans need to take a breath, and chill. They have not read the script. Our team is working closely with one of the original creators of Ninja Turtles to help expand and give a more complex back story. Relax, we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world.”
Sooooooo a group of alien turtles come down to earth and then step into some ooze?
What do you think of Michael Bay and the new version of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Before Bay steps on your childhood memories, here’s a little bit of nostalgia for you.