Southwest Airlines Plane Grounded After Woman Pokes Snoring Passenger With Pen

When Lenny Mordarski arrived for Southwest Airlines flight 577 on Thursday, he was a little tired. Soon after he was seated, Mordarski fell into a deep sleep, which reportedly included some loud snoring.

Mr. Mordarski was later poked hard in the arm by a very agitated fellow passenger on the flight, which was bound for Manchester, New Hampshire. As a result of the disturbance at Midway Airport, the flight was grounded.

The woman who stabbed the snoring passenger was removed from the flight by officials. The encounter left the victim’s shirt sleeve full of ink.

Mordarski told reporters, “Imagine being asleep and then being stung by bees, and then waking up and going ‘owww.’”

According to Mordarski, the woman sitting next to him hurt him with the pen.

His friend, Michael Sutton, said, “Chucklehead here fell asleep on the taxi on the runway, and I guess his arm kind of brushed over to her. She just went nuts and started stabbing him with the pen. He screamed really loud, almost like a little girl.”

The incident was no fun for the poor “chucklehead,” as he told reporters, “Yeah, my arm hurt because I was being stabbed by a pen. And that’s why I made a lot of noise and the attendants came.”

A spokesperson for Southwest Airlines told the press about the incident, confirming that the aircraft needed to return to the gate.

Mordarski added, “She was smirking, and we just never… I mean, she said zero at this point, and I just kind of, and all I wanted to do was not be sitting next to her.”

Sutton wasn’t too concerned with the whole affair; when the Chicago Fire Department was called to look at Mordarski’s injuries, there was free booze all round.

“They gave us free gin and tonics. They were super nice. They were making jokes at the end of it, said ‘Everyone keep your pens, keep your writing utensils to yourself,’” he said.

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