Madison Holleran Suicide Note: Parents Reveal Late Track Star’s Heartbreaking Letter


Popular Ivy League track star Madison Holleran died last year, and her death shocked family, and friends at the University of Pennsylvania. One year later, Maddy’s family shared their daughter’s last words in a suicide note she left behind before jumping to her death in Philadelphia. They hope Madison’s suicide letter promotes awareness about mental health and depression, which oftentimes is only discovered when it’s too late.

January 17, 2014, is a date Madison’s loved ones will likely never forget. The popular bubbly and outgoing track and field athlete, 19 at the time, jumped from a parking garage and ended her life. Moments earlier, she took a picture of a tranquil setting nearby and posted it to her Instagram account. In the wake of her death, Madison Holleran’s loving mother and father discovered gifts and a chilling suicide note their daughter left behind.

Maddy (right) with track mate

“I thought how unpleasant it is to be locked out, and I thought how it is worse perhaps to be locked in. For you mom… the necklaces… For you, Nana & Papa… GingerSnaps (always reminds me of you)… For you Ingrid… The Happiness Project. And Dad… the Godiva chocolate truffles. I love you all… I’m sorry. I love you.”

The suicide note revealed that Madison Holleran left her mom necklaces, her father chocolate, and her grandparents cookies. Jim Holleran, Maddy’s dad, recalls fond memories of his baby girl, and celebrates her life, albeit a short one.

“During the funeral, a guy from [the town] came and said, ‘Jim, if I were to tell you, I’m God and I’m going to give you a daughter for 19 years but I will take her back, will you take this deal?’ ”

“And I said, you just told me about Madison. So I would say yes. She gave me 19 phenomenal years.”

Madison and her father

Madison’s mom, Stacy Holleran, who was clearly left numb by the suicide note, recalls how her daughter took her off-guard back in December of 2013 by informing them of feelings she had centered on self-harm.

“I was shocked. She’s never been depressed before. I knew she needed a therapist, but I couldn’t get her an appointment because it was the weekend. On Sunday I had a friend come over who works in the mental health field.”

A big turnaround occurred in short order: Madison appeared to improve during the holiday break and was seen having a good time with family and friends. However, when she returned back to the university, things apparently went downhill fast, too late for anyone to intervene.

By all accounts, Holleran was bright and hailed as a rising track star. However, her father said she was struggling with her studies. It’s unknown if that had a direct impact on her decision to choose suicide. The note leaves much to conjecture.

A Facebook page, the Madison Holleran Memorial, is set up in her name. If you or anyone you know is depressed or suicidal, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255).

[Image via: NJ.com]

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