Britney Spears is 30 (HOW?)

In news that makes me feel older than Moses, Britney Spears turned 30 on Friday. THIRTY. I don’t even know where the past fourteen years went since that video, but went they did.

The singer celebrated her big day on Friday in charmingly understated fashion, trying a bit of ice-skating in Houston with boyfriend Jason Trawick. But as she enjoyed her modest celebrations, celebrities were queuing up to congratulate her. On Celebuzz, professional non-entity Kim Kardashian wrote:

“Happy birthday to the beautiful Miss Britney Spears! Welcome to the 30’s club, Brit!! I wish you all the best for this next year and beyond. You’re going to love your 30’s! I love you and hope you have a magical day.”

Reportedly, Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga phoned Spears on Friday, and the Twittersphere was crammed with slebs writing sloppy remarks. Nicki Minaj, Lance Bass (who called Spears “grandma” – oh, my sides), Rihanna, Katy Perry, Ke$ha, Pauly D, Heidi Klum, Miley Cyrus and Christina Aguilera all sent messages of goodwill.

A few even got replies. Ryan Seacrest wrote: “7 years and so many frosted tips later, we’re both finally 30!” and Spears responded with, “Next step for you are extensions!” OH YOU GUYS.

The pop star also replied to Aguilera, tweeting her, “Thank you girl. Max is so cute! Miss you. Xxoo.” People reports the singer read her many messages in bed, accompanied by sons Preston, 6, and Jayden, 5.

Alas, there’s no rest for the wicked – Spears resumes her South American tour on Saturday, and is playing a free show in Mexico City the day after. The weekend after, her world tour concludes. Happy belated birthday, Ms. Spears.