The law really is an ass. Or at least it would appear so, if some of the bizarre and bewildering pet laws which were recently detailed on a new infographic are anything to go by.
For example, if you live in Chicago and ever fancied taking your dog to a romantic night at the opera for little bit of Madame Butterfly, then you should know you'll probably be arrested because it's actually illegal to take dogs to the opera in the windy city. And in case you're wondering, pet lions are also banned from going to the cinema in Baltimore, Maryland. So it looks like you'll have to rent a copy of Born Free and enjoy a quiet night in with your domesticated man-eater instead.
Why our founding fathers felt the need to introduce such bizarre laws governing pets in the first instance beggars belief, but a new infographic created by an insurance company lovingly recreates 40 of the most insane pet laws from across the globe.
Now while it may get hotter than hell in Miami, Florida, barking lie a dog, purring like a pussy, or kicking like a mule may land you in some serious deep water in the Sunshine State, because it's actually illegal to imitate an animal in Miami.
And if you live in Oklahoma, don't dare pull a face at a dog. It's forbidden. Why? No one knows. Perhaps the faces of the Sooner State natives proved just too much for the canine population way back when. What's known for sure is that anyone offending man's best friend through the freakiness of their features alone faces a heavy fine or even jail time. For some reason, dogs in Oklahoma are also forbidden from congregating in groups of three or more unless they have a signed permit from the mayor. What are those darn canines planning?
They like to keep it civil in Little Rock, Arkansas. Dogs are banned from barking after 6 p.m. And in Wallace, somewhat disturbingly, there's a law forbidding you from sleeping in your dog's kennel.
Any hound dog who appreciates the finer things in life are plum out of luck if they happen to call Idaho home. The state runs a zero tolerance policy when it comes to letting your dog indulge in the odd whisky or cigar.
Say a prayer for the dogs of Paulding County in Ohio. If they step out of line, the boys in blue are allowed to bite them to calm them down. Ouch!
In Connecticut, dogs aren't allowed to get any ink done without first reporting their tattoos to the authorities. To make matters worse, those Hartford hounds are in serious need of an education. But wait, it's against the law to educate a dog in Connecticut.
It's just dandy for dogs to terrorize cats in Minnesota, but if you're a cat and fancy chasing a dog up a telegraph pole, then you better watch out, because you're breaking the law of the land in the Gopher State!
In Wyoming, they love their rabbits. So much so that it's actually illegal to photograph Elmer Fudd's arch enemy between January and April without written permission.
What's up with that, doc? Sure sounds like these laws were written by a bunch of looney tunes.