Vladimir Putin Does Not Have Pancreatic Cancer, Confirms Kremlin Spokesman

Vladimir Putin does not have pancreatic cancer, according to a Kremlin spokesman, who warned the inquisitive reporter to “bite their tongue,” after asking him the question.

Dmitry Peskov, a representative for Putin, responded to speculation in the media that the President was unwell, telling RIA Novosti journalists they, “shouldn’t bank on it,” adding, less aggressively, that “everything’s fine.”

Last Friday, the New York Post reported that a number of “sources” had told them that Putin was suffering from cancer and was being treated by an elderly German doctor.

As per that report, “News outlets from Belarus to Poland have reported for months that the Russian strongman has cancer of the spinal cord. But my sources say it’s pancreatic cancer, one of the most lethal forms of the disease. Putin is allegedly being treated by an elderly doctor from the old East Germany whom Putin met decades ago while serving in Dresden for the KGB. The doctor has been trying various treatments including steroid shots, which would explain Putin’s puffy appearance.”

According to Richard Johnson, writing for the Post, “The doc had been trying various treatments, including steroid shots, which would explain Putin’s puffy appearance. But I’m told the physician quit recently, confiding that he was mistreated by Putin’s security detail.”

The rumors surrounding Vladimir Putin’s health come just a few days after his speech in Sochi, where he blames America for most of the world’s ills. He said the following about the U.S. involvement in the Middle East war raging in Syria and Iraq.

“They are throwing their might to remove the risks they have created themselves, and they are paying an increasing price. I think that the policies of the ruling elite are erroneous. I am convinced that they go against our interests, undermine trust in the United States,” he explained.