No matter what a stripper tells you, there is no sex in the Champagne Room. None. One Montana man would have done well to listen Chris Rock's wise words, but instead he called 911 after a stripper didn't make good on what he thought was a done deal. It went about as well as you'd think.
William McDaniel, 53, might have thought he was getting a happy ending of sorts when he paid $350 for a private dance at Sagebrush Sam's Exotic Dance Club and Casino in Rocker, Mont. McDaniel, according to The Smoking Gun, may or may not have gone into Sagebrush Sam's Champagne Room, the "more private" area of a strip club that strippers sometimes talk up as though a little something extra might happen in there... if one pays the price of entry.
For the sake of hilarity, let's assume he did order a bottle of Sagebrush Sam's finest champagne, at $350 a pop. There is, as Mr. Rock so aptly put it more than a decade ago, champagne in the Champagne Room. But patrons don't want champagne, and McDaniel didn't want champagne. He wanted sex, and there is no sex in the champagne room.
McDaniel wasn't terribly happy about that, and he called the cops to settle the dispute. He dialed 911, in fact, hoping to register a consumer complaint.
When the police arrived, McDaniel was in for a surprise. Officers questioned McDaniel and found out what exactly he had been expecting: namely, sexual favors in exchange for money.
Turns out that's a crime. Who knew?
McDaniels was arrested and sent to the Butte-Silver Bow Detention Center. After posting bond, he was released on Sunday.
The Smoking Gun notes that the Sagebrush Sam's has only one review on Yelp, which notes that the club "is dirty and smells like vomit" and is in need of a complete makeover. "Even the stripper pole looked like it was going to break loose from the floor," the reviewer added.
Also, there is no sex in the champagne room. If a stripper leads you on and you're fool enough to give her $350 and she doesn't come through with sex, let it slide. Why spend the weekend in jail because she wouldn't "smudge your Puma?"
Of course, sex with strippers sometimes isn't all it's cracked up to be. Earlier this year, rumors emerged that NBA star Paul George had gotten a bit of that highly sought after champagne himself and wound up in hot water after the stripper turned up pregnant. George reportedly offered the stripper $1 million to terminate the pregnancy. Of course, George's supposed efforts to keep the incident quiet backfired, and the story blew up quite big.