Bradley Wiggins Confirms Retirement After 20-Year Career, 5 Olympic Gold Medals, Historical Tour De France Win

Bradley Wiggins Confirms Retirement After 20-Year Career, 5 Olympic Gold Medals, Historical Tour De France Win

Sir Bradley Wiggins retires from the world of professional cycling after an impressive 20-year career filled with awards, accolades, and historic victories. The 36-year-old Olympic gold medalist confirmed his retirement decision on Instagram Wednesday with a photo that speaks volumes about his accomplishments over the past two decades. “Wiggo” used the photo caption’s caption to […]

Sex Pistols Spurned 2012 Olympic Appearance Because Of Bizarre Gaffe By Organizers

Sex Pistols Spurned 2012 Olympic Appearance Because Of Bizarre Gaffe By Organizers

The Sex Pistols, Britain’s legendary punk rock band who — albeit reluctantly — led a musical uprising that upended the U.K. cultural landscape in the mid 1970s, were offered a chance to reunite at the 2012 London Olympics. But the aging punk rockers, now all pushing 60, turned down the proposition because the organizers made […]

Michael Phelps’ Comeback: One Step Closer To The Olympics?

Michael Phelps’ Comeback: One Step Closer To The Olympics?

On Thursday, one of the greatest Olympians in American history, Michael Phelps, got one step closer to a possible return to the Summer Games in 2016. Phelps participated in his first competitive meet at the Arena Grand Prix in Mesa, Arizona, and finished with the best qualifying time in the 100-meter butterfly. The 28-year-old led […]

David Beckham Knighthood Snub Led To Elite-Level Power Struggle

David Beckham Knighthood Snub Led To Elite-Level Power Struggle

David Beckham is many things. He’s the world’s most famous soccer (aka football) star, though he just retired after the 2012/13 season. He is a model, advertising pitchman, a dad and the husband of a Spice Girl. David Beckham was the face of London’s successful bid to obtain the 2014 Olympics, and of England’s unsuccessful […]

2012 Olympics Had Too Much Sex, Satanic Influence

2012 Olympics Had Too Much Sex, Satanic Influence

Duluth, MN – One upset couple didn’t take too kindly to the 2012 Olympics and decided to pen a letter to the editor of their local newspaper to explain exactly why. According to the letter, it was simply impossible to enjoy the London Games what with all of the sex and Satanic influence overshadowing the […]

Prince Harry Vegas Vacation Remains Low-Key, No Midnight Partying This Trip

Prince Harry Vegas Vacation Remains Low-Key, No Midnight Partying This Trip

Prince Harry hopped a plane to Las Vegas after completing his duties at the London Olympics. The British Royal was spotted with bikini clad babes while sipping drinks by the pool at a Las Vegas hotel over the weekend. Prince Harry was adorned in red, flowery swim trunks while enjoying the Vegas party atmosphere, according […]

2012 London Olympics Generated 150 Million Tweets

2012 London Olympics Generated 150 Million Tweets

London, England – The 2012 London Olympics were a smash hit for social network Twitter. According to a recent report, the games generated thousands of tweets per minute for a total of more than 150 million postings. The games, which lasted 16 days, saw the most Twitter activity when Usain Bolt was competing. The world’s […]

Virgin Diaries: Lolo Jones Still Wants To Meet Tim Tebow

Virgin Diaries: Lolo Jones Still Wants To Meet Tim Tebow

Lolo Jones is one of the world’s most famous virgins (though she’s a pretty good athlete too). In a recent interview, Lolo revealed that carrying the V-card is a lonely venture and that she still wants to meet Tim Tebow, if only just to commiserate with him over their shared purity. At age 30, Lolo […]

Allyson Felix Wins Gold Medal In 200 Meter Race

Allyson Felix Wins Gold Medal In 200 Meter Race

Allyson Felix won the gold medal in the 200 meter race today after twice being denied top honors. The American runner won the 200 meter race in 21.88 seconds. Allyson Felix beat the score of Jamaican opponent Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce by 0.21 seconds. Felix’s Olympic teammate Carmelita Jeter earned the bronze medal in the 200 meter […]

New Strain Of Marijuana Named After Usain Bolt Is Flying Off Pot Dispensary Shelves

New Strain Of Marijuana Named After Usain Bolt Is Flying Off Pot Dispensary Shelves

Usain Bolt OG pot is a new strain of marijuana which is allegedly so fast-hitting that it just had to be named in honor of the fastest man in the world. California medical marijuana dispensaries are struggling to keep the Usain Bolt OG marijuana in stock and have reportedly sold a multitude of the cannabis […]

Do Olympic Swimmers Pee In The Pool? Michael Phelps: “Yup, Everybody”

Do Olympic Swimmers Pee In The Pool? Michael Phelps: “Yup, Everybody”

We’ve long suspected it. Heck, maybe we’ve known it all along. Everybody pees in the pool, including U.S. Olympic swim team members. Ryan Lochte fessed up to it recently, and apparently, Michael Phelps agrees. When Lochte confessed to using the pool as a toilet, he stirred a bit of shock and controversy, but not among […]

Ryan Lochte Parties In A Car Full Of Hotties After End Of Olympic Swimming

Ryan Lochte Parties In A Car Full Of Hotties After End Of Olympic Swimming

Ryan Lochte has gone on record correcting his mother’s previous assertion that the athlete only enjoys the company of ladies so long as he can send them away the next morning with a bit of cab money in their pocket. With his reputation absolved, Lochte and the rest of the U.S. swim team celebrated their […]

Usain Bolt Breaks Olympic Record In Men’s 100

Usain Bolt Breaks Olympic Record In Men’s 100

It has been four years since he solidified his hold on the title of World’s Fastest Man, and still no one is any closer to catching Jamaica’s Usain Bolt. The superstar runner didn’t get off to the best of starts Sunday at the London Olympic games but that didn’t stop him from rolling to an […]

Andy Murray Falls Federer, Wins Olympic Gold

Andy Murray Falls Federer, Wins Olympic Gold

Andy Murray has lost three of his last four grand slam titles to Roger Federer, a streak that came to an end on Sunday morning as the Scotsman managed to blow by Federer in three straight sets. Murray dominated Roger 6-2, 6-1, 6-4 in front of a crowd made up largely of supporters from his […]

Michael Phelps Swims His Final Individual Race, Winning…

Michael Phelps Swims His Final Individual Race, Winning…

…the gold medal, of course! Michael Phelps won the 100-meter butterfly at the London Olympic Games today, grabbing the record 17th gold, and his 21st medal overall in his entire Olympic career, reports the Associated Press. The 100-meter butterfly was the final individual race of Phelps’ career, and his gold win marks a milestone in […]

Ann Romney’s Horse Dances In Olympics, Mitt’s Wife Celebrates Rafalca’s Hot Moves

Ann Romney’s Horse Dances In Olympics, Mitt’s Wife Celebrates Rafalca’s Hot Moves

Ann Romney’s horse made a showing in the London Olympics yesterday, dancing his fancy little hooves off at a champagne-festooned dressage event along with several other top-level dressage horses from around the world. Ann Romney’s horse Rafalca has indeed been mocked in recent weeks as a bit of Romney-family frippery, but per the New York […]

Rebecca Soni Sets World Record, Wins Gold In 200M Breaststroke

Rebecca Soni Sets World Record, Wins Gold In 200M Breaststroke

US Olympic swimmer Rebecca Soni set a new world record and also captured a gold medal during Thursday’s women’s 200 breaststroke, the same event she won in 2008. USA Today reports that Soni dominated in every heat in the 200 breaststroke, even setting the world record in the semifinal heat Wednesday night. On Thursday, she […]

USA Crushes Nigeria In Mens Hoops And Breaks Olympic Scoring Record

USA Crushes Nigeria In Mens Hoops And Breaks Olympic Scoring Record

Team USA decided to let everyone know they have come to London to win, when they demolished Nigeria, 156-73, in men’ s Group A basketball. The awesome performance on Thursday night, August 2, 2012, broke several all-time Olympic records for men’ s hoops, including total points (156), points in the first half (78), and margin […]

South Korean Weightlifter Sa Jae-hyouk Suffers Horrific Injury While Competing In London

South Korean Weightlifter Sa Jae-hyouk Suffers Horrific Injury While Competing In London

South Korean weightlifter Sa Jae-hyouk attempted to lift 357 pounds on Wednesday, an act which resulted in a grotesquely dislocated elbow. Since I’m not a big fan of seeing anyone writhe around in pure agony, the clip and images associated with this truly horrific injury aren’t really my cup of tea. If you’re at all […]

Fun Fact: An Olympic Gold Medal Costs U.S. Athletes $9,000 In Taxes

Fun Fact: An Olympic Gold Medal Costs U.S. Athletes $9,000 In Taxes

Gold medalists return to the United States as folk heroes, netting recognition and praise from all corners of the nation. Though there’s one particular group that these athletes probably don’t enjoy such attention from: the IRS. Olympic athletes have to pay a small fortune in taxes for the medals they take home, though not due […]

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