It never fails, a catastrophe happens and the brain-dead loopy as wet noodles contingent comes out from the woodwork.

There is a theory going around that the 8.9 earthquake that hit Japan on March 11, 2011 is the result of a ‘supermoon’, which apparently refers to the coming moon’s perigee, or when the moon reaches its closest point to the earth.

The argument being that during this time of the moon’s unusual closeness to the earth we would experience more and more natural disasters because of the moon’s effect on our gravity.

Phil Plait from Bad Astromony had this to say about the supermoon silliness:

Study after study has shown that big earthquakes are not caused by the Moon, super or otherwise. It would make some sort of sense to think that maybe there is a connection, since the Moon pulls on the Earth, and the majority of earthquakes are caused by tectonic plates slipping past or under each other. However, you can look at the timing of earthquakes versus the distance (and phase) of the Moon, and at best there is a weak correlation between shallow, low intensity quakes and the Moon… and certainly none with major quakes.

Think about it: if there were some connection, and it were this obvious, geologists and seismologists would be issuing warnings every perigee and every full Moon. These are people who have devoted their lives to understanding how the Earth shakes, and would be screaming their heads off if it were something as easy and obvious as the Moon. They don’t because there’s no connection.

So take that you nut-bars, back to the woodwork with you.

image via Gizmodo

Japanese earthquake brings out a stupid ‘supermoon’ theory is a post from: The Inquisitr

Destructoid has an eye-opening post focusing on the “scary amount” of user-created levels in LittleBigPlanet 2 based on assassinating Barack Obama. The PlayStation 3 title and its predecessor have taken user-generated content to a whole new level, with customizable features and props out the wazoo.

While that’s mostly a great thing, there is a downside. Namely, vile idiots making levels with charming names such as:

♦  obama kill read description
♦  defeat obamas
♦  hêârt if ù häte ôbámå ( seriously ) h4h
♦  m odes to kill obama
♦  stupid obama
♦  KILL OBAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
♦  arrest obama for life

Groan. Nice to see political discourse as cool-headed as ever in the States. And so sensitive given recent events! Alas, I suppose this is the problem with user-defined content: you’ll always get some skinwaster creating this sort of nonsense.

Just don’t let it put you off the game, which (a few idiots aside) is splendid.

[Via Destructoid]

‘Kill Obama’ levels everywhere in LittleBigPlanet 2 is a post from: The Inquisitr

Sarah Palin is back in the news for her anti-book-learnin’ stance, this time for moronically tweeting a word she thought existed, deleting the tweet, and then pretending like she meant to do it all along.

Palin was mouthing off on the microblogging service about plans to put a mosque near Ground Zero, which in and of itself is a stupid objection- would anyone oppose a church near the Oklahoma City bombing site because Timothy McVeigh was presumably Christian? Not content to merely leave it at embarrassing Americans everywhere with her ignorance, Palin asked “Muslims” to “pls refudiate” the mosque. What she meant by “refudiating” a mosque or plans to build one remains to be seen.

True to form, Palin is refusing to admit she’s wrong or misspoke, falling back on the “I meant to do that” defense:

Palin then used her Twitter feed to align herself with former President George W. Bush, President Barack Obama and—yes—William Shakespeare.

“‘Refudiate,’ ‘misunderestimate,’ ‘wee-wee’d up.’ English is a living language. Shakespeare liked to coin new words too. Got to celebrate it!”

Prior to the tweet comparing herself to Shakespeare, Palin tweeted twice about the Ground Zero mosque controversy. Those tweets are actually no less stupid than the “refudiate” one:

Peaceful New Yorkers, pls refute the Ground Zero mosque plan if you believe catastrophic pain caused @ Twin Towers site is too raw, too real

Peace-seeking Muslims, pls understand, Ground Zero mosque is UNNECESSARY provocation; it stabs hearts. Pls reject it in interest of healing

Palin asks ‘Muslims’ to ‘refudiate’ Ground Zero mosque, compares self to Shakespeare is a post from: The Inquisitr

Although it isn’t yet April 1st, FoxNation managed to get themselves punked by a (very old) satirical post about the deliciously ironic death of a “global warming activist” in Antarctica.

Instead of posting a mea culpa, Fox scrubbed the post from the site- but Google cache has the goods. The original satirical post that the FoxNation post was based on came from ecoEnquirer, a site currently sporting top headlines of “Vatican Sued Over Katrina,” “Court Orders Fisherman To Apologize to Eagle,” and “Levitating Islands Captured By Spy Satellite.” Tee hee. If that wasn’t enough of a clue, here’s some text on the tragic death of Prof. James Schneider originally quoted by the original FoxNation piece:

One friend of Prof. Schneider told ecoEnquirer that he had been planning a trip to an ice sheet to film the devastation brought on by global warming. His wife, Linda, said that she had heard him discussing the trip with his environmental activist friends, but she assumed that he was talking about the Greenland ice sheet, a much smaller ice sheet than Antarctica.

“He kept talking about when they ‘get down to chili’, and I thought they were talking about the order in which they would consume their food supplies”, Mrs. Schneider recounted. “I had no idea they were talking about Chile, the country from which you usually fly or sail in order to reach Antarctica.”

The clearly satirical nature of the story didn’t stop the commenters from rejoicing in what they believed was the painful, actual death of a scientist in Antarctica:

I’m sorry but this is about the funniest thing I’ve ever read!! Talk about what comes around goes around!!!!!!!!!! Ya get what you ask for – this has it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you FOX I needed that. This is delicious just goes to show what elitism and arrogance will do to you if you use it on mother nature.

Somehow or another, the liberal media and Al Gore will spin this and blame it on global warming. Not sure how they’ll do that but it will be interesting to find out.

[Comedy Central]

FoxNation punked by Climate Change parody story is a post from: The Inquisitr

[Dontevenreply.com, via Geekologie]

Awesome: Man seeks disguised weapons, hilarity ensues is a post from: The Inquisitr

Everyone knows that you shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, but we often neglect the maxim that you shouldn’t clap like an idiot right behind it.

[Break.com]

Horses: not as dumb as you think is a post from: The Inquisitr

How romantic…

Reality TV douchenozzle Spencer Pratt told press that if wife Heidi gets pregnant, it’s all over. The 26-year-old star feels that he’s too immature to reproduce, and even seemed to address his missus’ veiled threat to get knocked up “accidentally” in the meantime. Heidi said:

“I think I’m ready… I think I was born ready. I’m very maternal. I’m very loving. I would be the best mom ever. [Spencer doesn't feel] quite the same, but maybe he just doesn’t know he wants kids yet. I think he never wants kids, but maybe I’ll have a surprise for him.”

Hmm… Heidi, for someone who’s so Christ-y, that doesn’t seem like a very Christian thing to do in your marriage. But Spencer won’t be falling for that babydaddy stuff. Regardless of what he promised in front of God and their families, if Heidi gets pregnant, she gets kicked to the curb. Spencer explains:

“What happens if she does? I told her there’s a divorce or adoption… If she’s not down with the adoption, I think it’s divorce.”

“Heidi is, like, trying to have a baby like it’s going to buy a new pair of Louis Vuittons. She’s really ready to start this family. She’s not playing. And that’s what I’m saying — you can’t sneak a baby.”

I think many people would agree that there’s probably not any point in our lifetimes where the world will “want,” as he refers to the possibility, a “Spencer Pratt spawn.” Still and all, even a vapid, vacillating irritant like Heidi doesn’t warrant that kind of treatment publicly.

[Source: Popcrunch]

Spencer to Heidi: if you get knocked up you can GTFO is a post from: The Inquisitr

I have a question, now… what happened to the C?

Glenn Beck’s argument is invalid because he can’t spell is a post from: The Inquisitr

Is it not readily apparent that Dance Dance Revolution won’t transfer well to the PC platform?

Apparently not to this insufferable douchebag. Laboring under the delusion that anyone on God’s green Earth is interested in watching him play DDR, he films a few minutes of gameplay before bitching up and smashing his monitor around. The camera then pans to a room bearing evidence of many past whine-fests, including a perfectly head-shaped dent in the wall. WoW Freakout Kid is again pwned.

If only he whacked himself in the cojones with the monitor and gotten out of the gene pool. Even if the video is totally staged, it is abundantly clear this dude is just an awful, awful person. (NSFW language throughout.)

DDR for PC gamer smashes his monitor is a post from: The Inquisitr

With predictable results…

His lack of shrieking makes me think they might have been broken before, but still… ouch. (NSFW language.)

How Not to Jump Into a Pool – Watch more Funny Videos

Video: Idiot dives into shallow end of the pool is a post from: The Inquisitr

A young British man was rushed to the hospital Tuesday morning in Stevenage, Hertfordshire, after being stupid enough to try to circumcise his own dangle with a pair of nail clippers.

Regarding the so-close-yet-so-far to a Darwin Award act, Dr. Obvious told the UK Telegraph:

“This is something we would advise men never to attempt. The results can be quite horrific and long-lasting and have quite an affect on a man’s sexual performance. Using a pair of nail clippers must have caused excruciating pain, even if he had had a few drinks beforehand.”

ORLY? I neither have a penis nor attended any kind of medical training and I could tell you that much. As for why the man attempted to give his soldier a haircut in a country that does it for free, the article was sadly mum.

Okay, attempting your own circumcision is ridiculously retarded. But didn’t he at least have an x-acto knife in his arsenal of idiocy? Could anything to hand have possibly been less effective? Perhaps a nail file…

Really dumb guy attempts DIY circumcision with nail clippers is a post from: The Inquisitr

I like tattoos as long as they are done properly and don’t make you look like some idiot in the process. I’ve seen many that are some pretty incredible works of art and while I might not be one to have any myself I can appreciate those that do – to a point.

The simple truth is that there are times where you should really think twice about getting that brilliant idea transferred onto your skin. These are examples of those times.

hat tip to FreshPics

Dumbass tattoos is a post from: The Inquisitr