After I posted my extensive guide to turkey support outreach in the internet age and how not to die in a fire deep-frying a turkey, another quick Thanksgiving reference came to my attention.

I mentioned the Butterball helpline (1-800-Butterball, which on a cell phone will have to be 1-800-but-terb) but if you don’t want to drop the phone in vat of boiling gravy while trying to hold for help- did you know you can get turkey help on Twitter?

Avid tweeters hosting Thanksgiving this year may want to follow and converse with @Butterball on Twitter. The helpful person or persons manning the customer service account have been tweeting turkey advice all morning to panicked Twitter users in need of a helping tweet:

Turkey still frozen?Quick thaw -place breast side down in lrg container, fill w/cold H2O.Takes 30 mins per lb &change H2O every 30 minutes.

The Turkey Talk-Line will receive more than 10,000 calls today – will you be one? 1-800-BUTTERBALL #Thanksgiving

http://bit.ly/2pnclh @SpendLessTV We recommed cooking it breast side up and covering it 2/3 the way through

RT @acharpen:shotout 2the @butterball operators who take turkey day 2answer all kinds of crazy questions& attempt 2make our kitchens safer.

Happy Thanksgiving! The Turkey Talk-Line is open today from 6-6 CST to answer all your turkey related questions. 1-800-BUTTERBALL.

@xtinar about 4 hours. Check the calculator on butterball.com

@DebJorge we get 4.5-5 hrs at 325 but call 1-800-BUTTERBALL and ask them about the conve oven

@SuzanneBoyd let it rest for about 15 mins

@DelaneyKirk without stuffing 4-4.5 hrs with stuffing 5-5.5 but check out the calc on butterball.com too

@ladybugsgrama if its still frozen get it in a large tub and thaw 30 mins per lbs

As technology advances, sometimes it’s the little things that remind us what a pain in the ass some tasks used to be before the internet.

Roasting your first (or 50th) Thanksgiving turkey used to be a bit of a hassle, especially because- let’s face it- turkey kind of sucks and no one ever eats it besides on Thanksgiving unless they’re in Frontierworld in Disneyworld or on some kind of a sad, tasteless diet. No one knows how to thaw a turkey or what turkey cooking times are, much less how to brine a turkey so it doesn’t taste as much like dry sponge.

Nowadays, resources to help you cook your turkey without setting the kitchen on fire or overcooking the outer parts while giving the whole family salmonella abound. Hands down, the best one-stop shop for turkey morons is on Butterball’s site.

Butterball’s Tips section has a handy calculators page to provide specific information based on the amount of guests you’re hosting and tells you what size turkey you’ll need. And based on whether you’re defrosting it in the fridge or in cold water (you’d better get cracking either way), the site lets you know exactly how long that will take.

Interestingly, the site still says it’s okay to stuff a turkey, and even tells you how to brine a turkey- although that takes at least six hours. If you’re too much of a pretentious foodie to listen to Butterball and you enjoy building things before shoving food into your face, you can always check out Alton Brown’s turkey recipe.

Lastly, if you’re too overwhelmed and effing up Thanksgiving for the whole family, bear in mind you can call a real live human at 1-800-BUTTERBALL (1-800-288-8372).

Scripps Network has signed on to feature its video content on AOL Video, as well as on several other AOL services like AOL Food and AOL Home. The content will also appear on AOL-operated site Slashfood.

The lifestyle-driven material will start appearing later this summer.